#and thus I stand by what I said!! that cell sexy as hell!!

[interstate35south]

rewatching cells at work makes me feel insane at times bc I find myself sitting here thinking to myself "damn dendritic cell fine as fuck" and then I have to pause and remember. that's a cell. what am I doing here

[tokousername]

Dream Girl

A/N: let it be known that Rodrick as well as yourself are teenagers and thus there will be foul language.

Let's start this from the beginning, You live in a three person family, not important. What is important is that your home life is very quiet, the only exception to this being your neighbors. The Heffley's. Now, in that case, you need to be very specific when talking about 'the heffleys', by that, I mean one in particular. Rodrick. Him and his stupid, shitty band would play through most hours of the day, leaving you to put headphones on and attempt to block it out. Not this time, no way you're letting him get away with that.

You got up off your bed and opened your window, looking out at the garage that was below it, another thing you hated was living directly across from that dumb idiots room. That's right, you decided to stay in the attic most times. It was nice up here 99% of the time. You grumbled and ran down the stairs, your moms looked at you funny from the table.

"Honey, are you alright?" Mom asked, you nodded and sighed.

"I'm gonna go talk to Heffley about stopping all the noise." You tell her innocently. You slip on a pair of shoes and walk outside, immediately after you left, got in that scary mood your friends tell me about. You walked right up to his garage door and grabbed the handle, pulling it up and pushing it. It creaks and they all stopped playing, four dumb idiots in total.

"What the hell?" Rodrick asked, in an irritated tone.

"Mind shutting up for once?" You tell him, crossing your arms, the others 'ooh'd. "You too. I'm serious, I've been patient up until now but I can't stand to listen to your shitty music anymore, it's so damn loud Heffley."

He gets up from his drum set and you quickly realize the closer he gets, how tall this guy actually was. "What kind of dumb fuck name is Löded Diper anyway. You can't spell, you fuck up." You keep saying.

"Hey! It's a style choice." He tells you, sticking his drumsticks in your face, you grab them and smack him over the head with them.

"Stop being an idiot for once in your life, okay?" You tell him, you had been dealing with his crap for years, even before middle school. You grabbed his wrist and put the drumsticks back in his hand. Then spin on your heel to walk away, while you are, you can hear them start talking.

"Wow- your neighbors sexy." One of them moans, Rodrick groans.

"I know, she's scary though." He tells them.

After that, the rest of the day was fairly quiet, it was nice. A while later in the evening, You came back from the little corner store down the street, walked to your room and put the bag down. You were exhausted from the walk, it had been hot and bright out when you left. You began undressing and put PJ pants on, then took off your bra, you reached over to grab your shirt when a surprised shout came from the side of you. You covered your chest and looked around, then noticed Rodrick, fucking, Heffley, standing at his window in surprise. You'd forgotten to close the window and the curtains.

"Oh my god!" You shouted, you shut the curtains and put your shirt on, then opening them again. He didn't seem bothered.

"No, I- it's fine I mean- I didn't expect to see that- uh-" he tried to make sure you didn't think he was perving on me, but you knew that, he didn't seem like that kind of person.

"That's- that's embarrassing. Don't worry about it- ugh." You grumble, walking over and going through your stuff, Rodrick paused for a second and then spoke up.

"Embarrassed? About what?" He asks.

You stopped and looked over to him, "being seen half naked, idiot." You roll your eyes at him. He tilts his head and looks around with his eyes, then hums, seeing how that could be embarrassing to a normal person. He was beautiful when he wasn't covered in makeup and screaming, his side profile was hot, never would you ever admit that though.

"I wouldn't be embarrassed if I were you." He says. You scoff.

"Well you're not me. So." You open a bag of skittles and sit down in your chair, rolling it over to the window and leaning on it.

"You've got a hot body, if someone sees it then you should probably think of it as a blessing to their eyes." He grins stupidly. You let out a snort and sigh, looking away.

"No, fuck this, you're a dork. No wonder people don't talk to you at school." You say, going to shut the curtains, he looks offended.

"Sorry for complimenting you!" He calls out sarcastically.

"Yep! Thanks." You replied, shutting the window.

The next morning you tumbled out of bed, you reached for your cell and checked the time and day. "Oh." You perked up and smiled, you had a plan for what to do today. you got up and looked through your dresser, looking for your bathing suit, then ran to your bathroom to change, put some clothes over it, fix up your appearance and then you grabbed a towel, your keys and your cell and ran down the stairs.

"I'm going to the pool! See you later okay?" You called to your moms, you didn't hear what they said, you just wanted to get to the car, you hopped in, and then started it up, making your way to the local pool.

When you arrived you quickly made your way to the pool, you took a look around, it was a little crowded but not so much that you couldn't swim. You found a spot, pulled your clothes off, laid your stuff out and then dove into the pool, it wasn't cold, but it wasn't warm, it was a kind of refreshing feeling. You came back up to the top and moved your hair out of the way, you swam around for a while before deciding to get out for a bit, so you went to one side of the pool and put your hands on the deck, then pulled yourself up onto it.

You sighed and twisted the water out of your hair, then heard a wolf whistle. You actually looked in front of you and scoffed, you should have known.

"Well, well, showing off for me again?" Rodrick asks, his parents and his brother look at him in confusion, then at you. You look at them and let out a scoff at Rodrick, rolling your eyes, you turned to walk away, he quickly got up and followed, you looked over your shoulder at him. "Look, I'm sorry, I'll never mention it again, how's that?"

"Zip it, Heffley." You keep walking and press your arms into my chest, causing the water in your top to come out, you stopped by your stuff and he did too.

"I'm serious." He tells me.

"Yeah, and I'm an actress with billions." You shoot back at him.

"I deserve that- look, I'll make it up to you." He declares. You lay down in my spot and look up at him, he sits in the chair next to you. "Let me bring you to the boardwalk tomorrow." He suggested. That did sound appealing, he probably meant the amusement park that was on the pier.

"Are rollercoasters involved?" You ask. He sighed and looked around, smiling.

"Yes, there are." He looks back at you for an answer.

"Sure." You chirp, if there's anything you're up for, it's rollercoasters. "Is anyone else gonna come?"

"...uh- no, I came up with it just now-" he says, awkwardly looking at the ground and then at you again.

"Right.. so this sounds like a date to me. Is that what this is?" You ask him, turning on your side with your fist holding your head up. He looked at you body and then back at you and at the pool.

"Okay, yeah, it is." He sighs. "Do you want to go on a date with me tomorrow?" He asks properly, honestly you didn't think he'd actually talk to people in a civil way, but he was doing okay at it. You pretended to think and then nodded.

"Yes, I'd love to." You tell him, he whisper yells a 'yes' and was about to go off and probably tell someone when he ran back.

"Uh.. I'm gonna need your number-"

"Wow, that was so smooth." You teased him, he looked around and then put up his index finger, going off and then coming back with a marker.

"I carry this around, I don't have paper so maybe you could write it on my hand?" He suggests. You smiled at the idiot and gave in, holding your hand out, he gives his own to you and you write your number on his hand.

"This a permanent marker?" You ask.

"Uh.. no.." he realized. You shake your head and give him the marker back.

"Don't get your hand wet, or at least memorize the number first." You tell him. He nods awkwardly and then goes off again. You lean back in your chair and let your skin tan, usually you didn't burn so you didn't put sunscreen on, if you tanned it would get darker without it. Someone else comes over and blocks your sun so you open your eyes and look up, another guy, but this one you didn't know. You sigh and reach over, putting your sunglasses on and propping yourself up on your elbows. "Yes? You're kind of blocking the sun." You tell him, he smirks at you, clearly looking you up and down.

"Sorry about that, I just thought you were cute, I'm admiring the view." He says. You scoff in disgust as he keeps talking to you.

Rodrick's POV

I went over and flashed my hand to my loser brother Greg.

"No way! She didn't actually!" He denied.

"She totally did." I tell him, he shakes his head.

"No, no way you could score a girl like that."

"Like you can't score a girl like Holly?" I ask and smirk at him. He glared at me, "it's the same way, except I'm successful~" I sing, waving my hand in his face. He smirks at me and points behind me.

"Are you really?" He asks, I turn and look where he was pointing, there was another guy talking to Y/N, and he was actually toned. I glare at Greg and grumble, sitting down and watching them talk, he was smiling, although she didn't seem to enjoy his company.

2nd POV

"So, can I get your number? Maybe we could hang sometime." He suggests. You roll your eyes under my sunglasses and lean back in your chair.

"Not interested." You tell him, he seemed surprised. "Could you move please?" You wave your hand in a shooing way. He walked away and you heard laughter burst out a couple minutes later. His friends probably laughed at him for being rejected, a guy looking like him probably didn't get rejected often, but at the moment you weren't interested in anyone really, Rodrick being the exception, even then you weren't sure if you liked him, I guess you'll find out tomorrow.

The next day

While eating breakfast your phone rang, you checked it and saw from an unknown number, of course if it was Rodrick it would appear like that so you had to pick up. You answered it and put it to your ear, taking another bite of your pancakes. "Mhm?" You hummed, in case it was a scammer instead.

"Hey, what time should we go to the pier today?" You heard from the other end. You smiled and swallowed your food.

"I'm fine with anytime, in fact.." You pause and check your watch. "We could go now." You tell him, he didn't say anything for a moment.

"Uh... give me like 20 minutes-" he cuts off and hangs up, you checked the phone and scoffed. Okay, Maybe he was in a rush to get ready, honestly you genuinely figured he just woke up, he did sound tired, his voice was a little deeper than it usually was. You finished your breakfast and thanked your moms, you already told them about the date and they were happy, at least one was, the other didn't seem like she liked him, which you totally get.

After a while you walked over there and knocked on their door, it swung open almost immediately, your hand was still in a fist. It was his little brother, you smiled, "Um.. hello.. is Rodrick ready?" you asked him, he seemed sincerely surprised.

"Wait, he actually scored a date with you??" He asks, you glance around.

"Uh.. yeah." you say, he let you in to wait and struck up a conversation.

"You know, Rodrick's a huge jerk." He says, "I'm pretty sure you don't want to go on a date with him." You looked down at him.

"I'm aware he's a jerk, but he's only like that to you obviously." You tell him.

"Seriously???" You nod at that question.

"He's pretty fine at school and he's not rude to me on purpose. It's probably because you're his brother." You shrug. He seemed disappointed in both Rodrick and himself. Probably because he was trying to make me cancel the date and failed. Rodrick comes down the stairs and shoved Greg to the side.

"Get outta my way, turd." He says, running to the kitchen. You laugh nervously as Greg looked at me. Rodrick comes back and lets you out of the house.

"Alright, let's bounce." He says. You told Greg goodbye and walked with him. "My car or yours?" He asks.

"I'm fine with either one, doesn't matter to me." You shrug, he nodded and walked to his van, he got in the drivers side and reached over his console and seat to open the passenger door, you rolled your eyes and put your sunglasses on, getting in the van, he started it and then you took off. You had all day to hang out at the amusement park, it was gonna be awesome.

When you arrived you both headed straight for the rollercoasters. "Yes, yes, yesss~" you sung, he smiled and you grabbed his hand, pulling him along, he stumbled a bit and you let him go when you got there.

"You like rollercoasters?" He asks the obvious, smirking.

"I love rollercoasters.." you tell him, he nods and the line moves up. You walked forward and then turn back to face him. "What's your favorite color?" You ask him. He seemed confused and even like you caught him off guard with that question. He sighed and walked forward, pushing you up a bit.

"Um, black." He says.

"That's not a color technically." You tell him. He rolls his eyes and leans down to look at you.

"Very, very, dark blue then." He smirks. "What's yours?" He asks you, you walked forward as the line moved again.

"F/C." You tell him, taking off your sunglasses.

"Nice to finally see you again." He teases. You scoffed and then you realized you were next there was an open seat and they asked you if you wanted it. You looked at Rodrick who shrugged, "go if you want to." He says. You look back and then shake your head.

"No, I'm- uh, we're gonna ride together." You smile, he looks away, smiling a little bit too. You both got on the ride when the time came and it was a blast, when you got off he grabbed your hands and started dancing you around, you giggled, you both played games, rode more rides and hung out eating for the next few hours. It was the best date you'd ever been on, at the end of the day you were sitting in the back of his van with him, it was surprisingly clean in there, you assumed he must have cleaned it.

"Give me some of those fries." He tells you, you furrow your brows and look at his drink.

"Give me some of your milkshake." You smile. He leans over and hands it to you.

"Keep it, I can't finish it anyway." He says, then steals one of your fries, you smile and pick up another fry, dipping it in the milkshake and holding it out.

"Bite, trust me it's good." You grin. He sighs and bites the fry, then takes the rest of it from you, only half.

"It is good." He admits, you were both sitting on opposite sides of the van but sitting across from each other. You gave him the rest of your fries and moved to sit next to him, crossing your legs and drinking his milkshake. He eats the rest of your fries and you nudge him.

"This was great.." you tell him, he looks over at you and then away awkwardly.

"Yeah.. I really liked it." He says, you lean your head on his shoulder and drink the rest of the shake.

"Let's go on another date again.. another time?" You offer, he seemed surprised and looked at you.

"Yeah." He says breathlessly.

[the-winter-smoulder]

What The Hell...

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Chapter Word Count: 1218

Warnings: Language! Mentions of Death, Panic Attack, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Angsty Goodness

Seriously... What the HELL?!

Since the defeat of Thanos, nothing has really been the same, especially not for Sam and Bucky.

Read Chapter 16 Here

Chapter 17: Who The Hell Do You Think I Am?

Bucky and Y/n made it swiftly down the long hallway. They heard another scream coming from behind the door.

“Cover me,” Bucky said, lowering his rifle as he prepared to kick the door in.

They burst through the door to see a dark-haired woman strapped to a table, a withered figure of a man five feet from her, the woman’s eyes wide with fear as she let out another scream.

“Let her go, Arthur!” Y/n yelled, pointing her rifle at him, Bucky close behind, rifle trained on Headlok.

“The Soldier,” Headlok hissed.

Y/n could feel Bucky’s body grow stiff, the fear beginning to curl off of him.

“I’m warning you, Arthur! Stand the fuck down!” Y/n yelled. She could hear the rest of the team coming down the hallway behind her.

“I admire your work, Soldier. I’m sure you want to tear me apart. I’m right there...” he pointed toward the table.

Y/n saw Bucky slowly begin to move his gun toward the woman strapped on the table.

“Bucky... resist him. Concentrate on my voice. That is the Doctor, that is not Headlok. Do not engage,” Y/n said, still trained on the monster before her, his wrinkled, pale face forming a terrifying smile, his clawed fingers moving like Wanda’s when she’s doing her thing.

Bucky lowered his rifle, dropping it on the floor. He pulled a knife and looked at the woman like a predator at his prey.

“Bucky! Stop! Don’t make me shoot you!” Y/n yelled, voice faltering.

“He can’t hear you, my dear,” Headlok snickered, “I’ve blocked you.”

“Bastard! Let them go, Arthur. I will shoot you.”

“You wouldn’t, not really, Y/n.”

“How do you know my name?” her eyes squinting, still focused on her target.

“You don’t think that I know who you are?” Headlok rasped, “My dear, I’m trying to replicate the efforts you took to get here. Melinda is proving to be useless thus far, so there may be no need for her going forward. But you... you have what I need.”

You heard the snap of a bow just before an arrow flew past your ear, striking Headlok between the eyes, electricity rendering him speechless, snapping Bucky and Melinda back to reality.

Bucky’s step backward faltered, Y/n rushed toward him as Sam and Clint ran to cuff Headlok with special handcuffs that Bruce designed. Wanda worked on unstrapping Melinda from the table.

“Bucky... Bucky, look at me,” Y/n said.

“I... I can’t... I could have...”

“But you didn’t, Bucky. You didn’t.”

He was shaking. That thousand-yard stare told Y/n that he was on the brink of a panic attack.

“Bucky, look at me, honey. You’re okay. Breathe with me, baby,” Y/n tried to grab his face, but he began to fall to his knees.

Y/n fell with him, tears stinging her eyes.

“Bucky... breathe. Look at me, baby. It’s just you and me right now. I’m here. I’m real.”

Bucky’s blue eyes finally looked into hers.

“Y/n?” he whispered; his voice so small.

“Yes, Bucky. I’m here.”

His eyes snapped shut as he took in a deep breath. He let it out slowly as he stood up. Y/n knew right away that he was compartmentalizing this, stuffing it down so they could finish the mission.

“I’m fine, Y/n. I’m okay. Where are the other two?”

Y/n turned to Melinda, “Dr. Leucenstern? Do you know where the others are being held?”

“Yes,” she began, rubbing her wrists, “There’s a door around the corner that leads to the holding cells.”

Y/n turned back to Bucky, “You okay?”

“For now. Let’s get the other two and get the hell outta here.”

     -----💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀-----

Y/n opened the door to the first cell and found Aurora chained to the wall next to a metal bed.

“Jeanne-Marie?” she whispered, crouching next to the weak woman.

“Who... who the hell are you?”

“Jeanne-Marie, I'm Y/n. I’m here to help you... to rescue you.”

Bucky ripped the chain from the wall, setting the woman somewhat free.

“We need to find the keys to get this collar off of her. I think it’s keeping her powers from manifesting,” Y/n stated.

“Got ‘em!” Clint yelled, running into the cell.

“Who are you people?”

“Jeanne-Marie, we’re...”

“Who is Jeanne-Marie? Who the hell do you think I am?!”

Bucky and Clint exchanged glances as Y/n took the keys and began to unlock the collar.

“Aurora?” Y/n asked.

“Try again, bitch,” the woman replied.

“Perhaps we’ve not been introduced. I know Jeanne-Marie Beaubier and Aurora,” Y/n explained kindly. “And you are?”

“A little bit reckless... I definitely haven’t met you before, but I'd love to get to know you better,” she said, pointing to Bucky.

“Right... can we talk to Jeanne-Marie or Aurora?” Bucky asked, unamused.

“Fine... but don’t think I'm done with you just yet, sexy,” she winked. Her body shuddered and her demeanor changed, back straight, ankles crossed and hands folded in her lap.

Y/n smiled, “Jeanne-Marie. You don’t know me, but I know you. Are you okay?”

“Much better now, thank you for asking. How do you know me?”

“I know you from another time and place,” Y/n began.

“You’re her! You’re the one he was looking for! Y/n Rogers? Right?”

“Yes, that’s me. Let’s get you out of here and we can catch up on our way back to the compound. Clint? Did you find Bobbi?”

“Yeah! She's here – I've got her,” he yelled back.

“Let’s get these three back home. I’ve got Headlok contained. Bruce’s collar and cuffs are keeping him at bay,” Sam explained. “We have a containment unit at the compound. Clint and I can interrogate this son of a bitch.”

     -----💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀-----

As they boarded the jet, Y/n gave Bucky’s hand a squeeze. He gave her a half-hearted smile in return, and she could still see the pain lingering in his eyes.

Wanda and Sam got the three ladies situated before bringing Headlok onboard in a small glass containment unit.

Wanda sat next to Bobbi, while Jeanne-Marie and Melinda sat next to one another, across from Bucky and Y/n.

Jeanne-Marie was staring at Bucky, telling him that she was, in fact, not Jeanne-Marie at the moment, but another one of her personalities.

“Down, girl,” Melinda said, “That one’s taken.”

“So? I bet I could break him.”

“Watch it,” Bucky said sternly, narrowing his eyes at her.

“Jeanne-Marie...” Y/n started.

“She’s not here right now. And she’s staying away for a bit.”

“Okay,” Y/n said, “Could I maybe chat with Aurora then? You're pissing off my boyfriend, and I don’t want to have to slap you.”

“Mmm... I prefer to do the slapping. But, if you insist,” the woman winked. She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, her eyes looked a little wild, but relaxed.

“So, you’re the one,” Aurora said.

“Who?” Y/n asked.

“The one he’s been looking for.”

“Why?” Bucky asked, annoyed.

“She’s an anomaly. He wanted her. And, he wanted you, too, Soldier.”

“What for?” Bucky growled through gritted teeth.

“To control you. To study her. To find out how she got here. To replicate that so he could dominate other timelines.”

“Neither of you are going anywhere near Headlok,” Sam said.

“Sounds good to me,” Y/n said.

“What the fuck is going on?” Bucky asked, rhetorically, staring up at the ceiling.

Chapter 18

     -----💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀💥🌀-----

Tag List

@sebastiansqueen​

@katiekate23​

@chipilerendi

@juenenfeu

@leosandbuckysgirl

@kcd15

@ace-of-spaids2

@lillyjay45

@twinerd14

[snarkwrites]

tease me | tim speedle | mature.

Notes: 

So this is kind of picking up where my one shot for Tim Speedle that I wrote for Christmas left off... I just felt like revisiting them, maybe a few months down the road. When her Christmas visit has turned into an extended stay and they’re all nice and settled and stuff... I decided to write filth.

I needed this, okay? I needed it. Literally no one asked for this but I wanted it, so here we are. If I have to yearn and thirst, you guys gotta suffer with me.

Warnings:

First of all, this content is not made for folks under 18+ years of age. And if you’re not a fan of sexual content, you will not like this, I can almost certainly guarantee that. If you choose to continue reading beyond the warnings, this is your problem. I warned you up here what you were in for.

If you are sticking around, this contains : unprotected sex, oral sex - female giving, teasing / nude selfies, and a little bit of dirty talk. Body fluids. That’s about it, honestly.

Tagging:

@chasingeverybreakingwave​ 

@twistnet​ 

                               [ faq | tag list doc ] 

The excitement I felt was so great that my hands were shaking a little. As a result, it was harder to get that perfect image to send Tim. Finally realizing that I wasn’t going to be able to pose myself seductively enough and manage to hold the phone in my hand to take the photo at the same time, I slipped off Tim’s bed and slunk across the room, unzipping my suitcase.

Once I’d found my tripod and set it up, propping my phone on it and setting up a timer to take the photo, I hurried back to Tim’s bed, draping myself across it lying on my stomach. My legs poised so that my toes were up. My hair falling down to frame my face and just barely hiding my eyes and the covers on his bed doing an okay job at making the photo a little less full on risque.

The flash lit the bedroom momentarily and I got up, slinking over to where I’d placed the phone, inspecting the photo. Once I deemed it worthy of sending, I opened the text conversation I had going with Tim.

[ Blondie ] Good morning, handsome.

[ Blondie ] I hope your day’s going better today. I’m just here, waiting...

[ Blondie ] attachment

[ Blondie ] I missed you in bed this morning… and in me.

Satisfied that I’d stayed well within that fine line of sexy but not too over the top after I re-read my messages, I hit send on the last one and flopped across Tim’s bed, stretching lazily. The sunrise was just starting to peek through the floor to ceiling windows and I slipped out of his bed, wandering over to stand in them and peer out, my eyes fixed on the view of the beach across the street from his place.

I tried to imagine his reaction upon receiving the texts I’d just sent while at work in the crime lab and the thought had me smiling to myself a little.

Yeah, I realized that I was stirring things up, but I didn’t care. We were making up for lost time. Coming to Miami like I had on a whim around Christmas was hands down, the best thing I’d done thus far.

My cell phone rang on the bed and I hurried back over, pouting a little when one look at the screen revealed that it was my boss and not Tim like I’d been hoping.

I sighed and picked it up, answering.

I couldn’t keep putting off a permanent decision and I knew this. It was either here or there. I was either about to uproot myself and make the move to Miami a permanent one or I was going to have to set a date to return to New York.

And as I gazed out the window at the beach across the street, a thought hit me.

Home was wherever Tim Speedle was now. I couldn’t imagine going back to New York. I didn’t even want to think about it. So with that realization in mind, I spoke up, interrupting Rex.

“I’m not coming back, actually. I won’t be renewing my contract with your agency.”

“You’re quitting? You can’t quit now, doll… you gotta strike while the iron is hot. And right now, there are some major names in the fashion world askin about you.” - his words had me laughing and shaking my head, because for the entire time I’d been modeling and stuff, Rex was always saying this. My big break was coming any minute now, he just knew it. Or there were people asking about me.

Until, of course, they mysteriously stopped. And I was left with my photography studio as my sole source of income.And honestly, I just wasn’t enjoying the modeling thing anymore. I’d never really wanted to get involved in it in the first place. I’d gotten to a point where I took less and less jobs.

“Sure they are, Rex. They’ve been asking for me since I was 21 and I signed with you and yet… I haven’t hit my big break yet.”

“Hey, whoa.. What about that bit part in the soap opera I got you?” Rex reminded me.

 I choked on my laughter and shook my head, pacing Tim’s bedroom.

“It was for an unnamed coma patient. I didn’t even have any lines. All I had to do was lie in a hospital bed and moan occasionally.” I reminded him, clearing my throat and repeating myself, much firmer. “I’m not renewing my contract. I’ll be moving to Miami soon. I’m thinking about opening a photography studio here, actually.”

“Okay, fine. It’s your life, baby girl. You do you. I just hope this little fling of yours down in Miami doesn’t backfire, kid.” Rex replied and then promptly, he hung up the phone on his end. I eyed the phone in my hand before laughing and shaking my head. After I deleted his number, I dug around in Tim’s shirt drawer, finding one of his thin gray t-shirts and I made my way down the hall, starting to clean the apartment a little bit. By the time I finished and was lying in the sunshine down on the beach, a quick look at my phone revealed that he should be getting a chance to look at my earlier texts.

I found myself staring at the phone, practically on pins and needles at this point.

XXX

Eric Delko stepped into the Trace area of the crime lab where Tim was working. The radio was cranked up, blasting Def Leppard. That probably explained why Tim hadn’t seen or heard the texts he’d gotten, Eric mused as he picked up his best friend’s phone, wandering over to where Tim stood, analyzing evidence from an earlier crime scene.

He cleared his throat and Tim nearly jumped a foot into the air, turning to glare at him. Eric held out the phone and chuckled. “You’re getting texts, Speed. I came in to see if you were still up for grabbing a bite. Or if you had other plans.”

That last bit was said in a teasing tone that Tim picked right up on. But Tim chose not to take the bait. Instead, he grabbed for his phone and unlocked it, going straight for his texts.

And when he saw what she’d texted him over the course of the morning, he nearly choked on a sip of bottled water he’d taken. His cock started to strain against his jeans and Tim shuffled his feet, trying to will the situation down.

Eric, of course, was taking it all in and he chuckled, mimicking the sound of a whip being cracked. “You’re so fucking whipped, Speed.”

“I’m not whipped.” Tim grumbled, giving Eric the middle finger as he laughed and shook his head. He was used to the good natured teasing. And his near death experience not so long ago had shown him that life was too short to let everything bother him like he’d done prior to.

He tore his eyes off of Eric, letting them settle on the picture she’d texted him earlier. Biting his lip. Mental images of the night before -and pretty much every night since her surprise arrival at Christmas, flashing through his mind like scenes from an explicit movie.

“You’re staring at the screen in a daze, man. The only other reason you’d be doing that is… Oh hell… She’s sexting you right now, isn’t she?” Eric tried to peer at the phone but Tim combatted this by turning away from his friend completely and squaring up so that his shoulders blocked the view a little better.

Eric chuckled. “I’m gonna go wait in the hall. Give you two a little privacy.” he teased again before ducking out of the lab, door swinging shut behind him with a soft thud.

 And the second Tim knew for sure Eric was out in the hall and out of his hair, he smirked to himself, throwing caution to the wind to text her back.

,, Two can play this game, blondie.” he thought to himself as he fired off texts to her.

[ Speed ] Morning, baby girl. 

[ Speed ] It’s going. Definitely a Monday.

[ Speed ] I can’t wait to get back there, fuck.

[ Speed ] Fuck… I’m so hard right now. You realize you’re startin something right now, yeah?

[ Speed ] Baby girl, I miss being inside of you. Just standing here thinking about how wet you get for me… The way you moan my name so loud. 

[ Speed ] 8 o’clock. My bed. What you wear doesn’t matter because I’m gonna tear it off either way…

[ Speed ] I love you, baby girl. Only 7 hours to go. ;P

After he’d sent the last text, he took a few deep breaths to attempt getting himself under control all over again, and then he stepped out into the hallway, catching up to Eric who chuckled and shook his head. Tim gave a lazy shove to the other man and through laughter he questioned, “Why are you bustin my balls anyway, man? Are you not doing the same with Calleigh right now?”

“ You’re the one who really didn’t get around much before, Speed. I’m your best friend. Kind of my job to bust your balls about your new girl. Speaking of… Calleigh was wondering if you two wanted to do something as a group sometime. She really wants to meet her.”

Tim chuckled and shrugged. “I’ll ask her tonight.”

XXX

The sound of my cell phone going off beside me on the beach towel had me waking up from my lazy little cat nap. I sat up and stretched, grabbing for it.

I fidgeted a little as I read Tim’s responses to the texts I’d sent him that morning. Biting my lip, I eyed the time.

Six more hours now. I blinked in shock. Had I really taken an hour nap on the beach?

It felt kind of nice.

[ Blondie ] Oh, trust me. I know exactly what I’m doing, baby.

I decided to push things just a little further. Since he was teasing me right back. Fair is fair, right? I posed myself and raised my phone so that the camera managed to catch my whole body and I took the picture.

[ Blondie ] attachment

[ Blondie ] Ugh, you’ve got me so wet right now. I can’t stop thinking about the way it felt this morning when you had your head between my thighs. 

[ Blondie ] What if I don’t wear anything? 

[ Blondie ] Fuck… I wish you were here right now.. Those hands all over my body.

[ Blondie ] I need you. I’m aching right now, baby.

Taking a few deep breaths to center myself, I sent the last text and stood, gathering my beach towel and stretching. I needed to get back to the apartment and take a shower. My thighs clenched as the thought spurred forth a series of mental imagery that had me aching. Tim pressing me against the wall of the shower and hitting his knees, spreading my legs and licking me clean. The little bite marks he left behind that were starting to fade.

I made my way back to the apartment and stripped down, stepping into a nice cool shower.

XXX

His eyes settled on the clock on the wall and he tapped his fingers against the desktop impatiently. It felt like time was crawling by, almost moving backwards.

His phone buzzed against the wooden desk and he grabbed it up, putting in his unlock code. His eyes danced over the texts she’d sent back to him. He let out a ragged deep breath as soon as the attachment was downloaded and he could see her posing in that little neon pink bikini, biting her lip. His eyes roamed over the picture and he smiled softly for a few seconds before saving it. 

“Fuck. You’re tryin to kill me today, baby girl.” he mumbled, mostly to himself as he turned his attention to responding to the texts she’d sent him.

[ Speed ] You tasted so fucking sweet. I’ve been dying for another taste of you all day, baby girl.

[ Speed ] If you don’t wear anything, that just makes it easier for me. 

[ Speed ] I might have to take you against the door though.

[ Speed ] I’m so hard I could break right now, baby girl. Wanna bury my cock inside you so deep…

[ Speed ] I’m on my way. Just fifteen more minutes. The slowest fifteen minutes of today, apparently.

[ Speed ] I want you naked. Waiting on me in bed. 

After he hit send, he set to finishing up the remainder of his paperwork and once that was done, he couldn’t get out of the lab and back to his apartment… To her… fast enough.

The drive across town seemed to take hours and not minutes.

XXX

My eyes settled on my cell phone screen and almost as soon as I realized just how close it was to time for Tim to be getting in from work, the wetter I got in anticipation. My cunt was throbbing already. We’d been teasing each other all day long. That teasing had me beyond ready for what I knew was coming my way as soon as he stepped through the door.

I’d just put the spaghetti I’d made us both onto plates when I heard the door shut. His heavy soled boots hitting the floor beside it with a soft thud. I bit my lip and called out to him, “In here, baby.” so he’d come into the kitchen and I went back to setting the table.

His arms wrapped around me from behind and he nipped at the shell of my ear, muttering against it “Something smells good, baby girl.”

“Spaghetti… Nonna’s sauce, too.” I answered, turning in his arms to press myself against him. He melted into me, putting my back right against the edge of the dining table and his mouth found mine in a hungry and biting kiss. My arms wrapped around his neck and I whimpered as his hands wandered down, grabbing hold of my ass, squeezing and rubbing me against him. I could feel him straining against his jeans already and if I thought I was wet before, I could feel my thighs slipping right off of each other in seconds. One of his hands left my ass, wandering up the hem of the tee shirt I’d taken out of his drawer to wear after my shower. When his palm settled against my throbbing cunt, I whimpered, rocking against it, breathless. 

He growled into another deep and bruising kiss as soon as he realized exactly how wet I was. Wordlessly, he scooped me up and carried me down the hall to his bedroom, pushing the door open, not bothering to break the kiss. He placed me on the bed and followed me down, settling over me.

The kiss broke and he gazed at me hungrily.

“I made food..” I barely managed to gasp the words. He licked his lips and spread my legs, leaning down and muttering against my mouth as his hand skimmed the inside of my thigh and settled against my aching cunt all over again, “I know, baby girl.. But I’m not exactly hungry for food right now, ya know?”

My back arched as his hand squeezed my center and he rocked himself against my lower body, letting me feel his cock straining at his jeans, getting even harder. His lips trailed down my neck lazily and he mumbled against my skin, “There’s something else I wanna taste so much more right now…” 

As he moved down my body, I tried to reach down between us, giving an impatient tug at the waistband of his jeans that only had him stopping to meet my gaze, chuckling quietly as he shook his head. “Not yet, baby girl.”

“Tim, please.” I moaned out, squirming and rocking against him, desperate for any kind of friction. What I really wanted was his cock buried inside me, but I knew he wasn’t going to give me that yet. Not after I’d been teasing him all day like I had.

Now, he was going to tease me.

His teeth caught on the hem of the tee shirt I’d borrowed of his to wear and he tugged it upward, playfully growling as he did so. Pulling me up so he could pull the shirt over my head and tossing it into the floor of the bedroom. While he had me sitting up, I went for the button and then the zip on his jeans and rose to my knees, pulling him into a greedy and biting kiss as I mumbled against his mouth with a soft giggle. “It’s my turn now.”

“Oh it is, hm?” he gasped as my mouth broke from his and started to ghost down the side of his neck. I gently shoved him against the mattress and the lower my mouth worked down his abdomen, the more I could feel him tensing with each little kitten lick, nip or kiss I left behind as I worked my way down. I tugged down his jeans and the boxers beneath and his cock sprang free, making me moan. Tim raised up slightly, watching as I dipped my head, taking his cock in my mouth, dragging my tongue across the tip and then lazily down the vein that ran the length of it. He shivered and his hands dug into the comforter and tangled up in my hair as he bucked his hips against my mouth carefully.

I wrapped my mouth around his length tighter, taking him deeper in my throat and the grip on my hair tightened as he groaned and rocked his hips against my mouth more urgently. This only made me smile to myself as I pulled my mouth away, a soft pop lingering in the air after suction was broken. After I caught my breath, I wrapped my lips around his cock again, bobbing up and down. His fingers tugged at my hair, guiding my mouth deeper until I felt the tip of his cock starting to hit my gag reflex. His other hand clutches the blanket. I kept at it, his groans and quiet growls and the way he moaned his name only spurring me onward. Until he was tapping me to get my attention.

I licked my lips, wiping my mouth and he  was raising up, grabbing hold of me and pulling me up his body. 

“I can’t wait, baby girl. Gotta have you right now. Fuck.” he groaned against my mouth as he captured it in another hungry and frenzied kiss. He slammed me down on his cock, gripping my hips as he pumped me up and down and I whimpered, my head falling back and my cries shattering the quiet of the apartment as they echoed off the bedroom walls. My nails dug into his shoulders and upper back lightly, raking over his skin as he filled and stretched me with his cock. 

“Oh fuck, Tim.. Baby, yeah. Faster, baby. C’mon.” I pleaded as my orgasm built quickly to an intense level I almost couldn’t keep at bay. His fingers squeezed my hips and he bucked himself up into me from below. Raising a hand, he reached up, catching hold of my jawline. Pulling my mouth down against his and conquering it in a deep kiss. His teeth hooked on my bottom lip, tugging at it and scraping against it and I whimpered as he started to slow down right as I felt my body tensing up and I could feel my orgasm about to shatter through.

He sat up, mumbling against my mouth, “Not yet, pretty girl. Not yet.” as he started to fuck into me slower… deeper. My head fell back and I bounced up and down on his cock until his hands slipped down my sides, squeezing my hips and bringing my movements to a grinding halt. He tilted my chin so that I had to look down at him and his mouth dove against mine, muttering softly into the kiss, “Easy, baby girl. I’m so fucking close right now.” and licked his lips as we pulled apart to breathe.

His hands moved down my body, gripping my ass as he started to buck into me from below and pump me up and down on his cock all over again. Slower. Almost so slow that I could feel him sinking in with each thrust, inch for inch. I was begging, whimpering his name over and over as I tried to get us going faster again, but he chuckled, gripping my ass harder, keeping me as still as he possibly could and shook his head no.

“Tim, c’mon baby, I… fuck.” I whined, begging for release. He muttered lazily against my mouth in a low and husky whisper, “After all the teasing today, baby girl… I’m gonna take my time with you.”

A shiver passed through me as his lips danced down my throat lazily, his teeth latching onto my skin here and there, leaving little marks behind as he continued to slowly fuck into me and pump me up and down on his cock. His lips moved slowly along my collar bones and I gasped, my head falling back in sheer bliss as he started to fuck into me deeper, the angle making every single deep drive feel amazing.

I dragged my hands through his hair, tugging at it as I buried my mouth against his, just to keep myself from screaming his name over and over when he continued to fuck into me deep and slow, pulling me up far enough with each drive that I could feel inch for inch of his thick cock as it buried back inside of me all over again. My fingers dug into his shoulders and his upper back and he shivered, nipping at my breasts as he circled my nipples with his tongue, teasing them to points, blowing on them softly, making me whimper and squirm in his lap, trying to speed up the pace.

He stopped completely, leaning his forehead against mine, taking my face in his hands as he gave me a deep and slow kiss, his lips locking around my bottom lip and tugging gently as it broke again for us to breathe.

“Love you so much baby girl. Having you here is amazing, you know that?”

I remembered my decision and at his words, I beamed softly, muttered back against his mouth with a soft giggle, “I’m glad you think so… Because honestly, I don’t want to leave.”

“You don’t have to, baby girl.”

“I’m not going to, Tim.” I answered, watching as the slow and lazy grin played at his lips, tugging the corners of his mouth upward. His hands smoothed over my hair and he pulled me against him as he started to fuck into me again.

Slow and deep. Lazy thrusts. He meant every single word of what he said when he’d told me earlier that he was going to take his time with me. And after my little surprise news, I could feel him relaxing.

I felt more relaxed too. I’d been feeling that way since I decided to stay earlier in the day.

We had all the time in the world now and I didn’t want to waste a single second of it…

I just wanted to enjoy being here, with him.

Because wherever Tim Speedle was, I knew that was where home was for me.

I gripped his face in my hands, pulling his mouth back against mine, pleading for my release. I ached for it. “C’mon, Tim, please baby?”

His grip relaxed on my body and I started to bounce up and down on his cock faster, whimpering and moaning, dragging my fingers over his back and through his hair as my orgasm shattered through, leaving me shaky, my walls clamping his cock as I rode out my high, milking his cock as it started to throb and he started to fuck into me harder and deeper, bottoming out, capturing my mouth in a deep and lasting kiss as his own orgasm took over and he filled me up.

“Feels so good, baby girl, fuck. I love the way it feels when you’re coming for me. You take me so well.” 

I deepened the kiss, my hand resting across the back of his neck as I did so. As we slowed to a stop and sat there, kissing and touching, he tilted my chin, making me look at him. Rolling his thumb over my bottom lip as he gazed at me in sheer adoration and I gazed right back at him in the same way. My eyes settled on the scar he still had from the life saving operation after he’d been shot and I lowered my lips, feathering a kiss over the wound. He chuckled, tilting my chin up, biting his lip.

The growling of our stomachs had us sharing a look, bursting into quiet laughter and Tim muttering quietly against my mouth, “That spaghetti’s cold by now. Want me to reheat it?”

“Yeah.”

He captured my mouth in another lingering kiss and mumbled against my lips with a chuckle “stay right here, baby girl. I got it.” as he let me settle into the bed and slid off, grabbing his boxers and slipping them back on, making his way down the hall and into the kitchen.

I smiled to myself.

Yeah, this really does feel like home.

[refinedbuffoonery]

Riley + Sunglasses + Undercover (6)

masterlist.

Read it on AO3. 

*****

Mac fidgeted with the T.V. remote. Riley hadn’t returned yet. Bozer and Matty busied themselves with digging up intel on Petrov, and Desi sprawled across the couch. 

Which left Mac with nothing to do but think. 

Riley would be back any minute now, and Mac had no idea what to say to her. They needed to talk about the kiss. Dropping a “you’re my best friend and favorite coworker, but surprise, I’m in love with you” bomb on her in the middle of a mission seemed like a stupid idea, but ignoring what happened would make it even more awkward than it already was. Fuck. 

Mac snapped his head toward the door as the lock clicked. Riley slipped inside, opening the door just wide enough to squeeze through. Her hair was a windswept, tangled mess, but other than that, she appeared to be fine. Tension eased in his chest that Mac hadn’t realized was there before. 

She still wore his jacket. 

Riley went right to his side, although she remained a respectful distance away instead of standing shoulder-to-shoulder like usual. She looked almost...shy. Mac could see the hesitation in her eyes. He really fucked up. Now she wouldn’t even come near him. 

“Miss much?” she asked. 

“Nobody’s planning on killing us, yet.” 

“First time this week,” she retorted. Mac chuckled, earning a glare from Desi. 

Slowly, Mac closed the space between himself and Riley, so they could talk without being overheard. He gave her the opportunity to back away, but, to his surprise, she didn’t. “We need to talk,” he whispered. Riley paled. Shit, that was not the reaction he wanted. Not even close. 

“Mac, I...I understand.” Her eyes said it all. She looked disappointed. Embarrassed. Hurt. No no no no no no. Whatever she thought she understood, it was a far cry from what he was about to say. Did she really not know how he felt? He wanted to touch her. He wanted to pull her into his arms and show her all the things she didn’t understand. He wanted to tell her that his heart belonged to her, and he was committed to her for the long haul, although that may not be as long as they’d like since they both had a penchant for getting shot at. And then, after all that, he wanted to back her into a wall and tell her how sexy she looked in his jacket and learn exactly how to elicit those little noises again. 

He needed to stop thinking those things about her. Riley could read him like a book. 

Yet, she’d utterly failed to see what was right in front of her face. Maybe...maybe she misunderstood because he’d hid it so well. Too well, if the brokenness in her eyes was any indication. 

“Riles, no--” 

She shook her head. “Don’t ‘Riles’ me right now.” 

“Got him,” Bozer announced, leaving Mac with his jaw hung open. His unsaid words evaporated off his tongue. 

“Viktor Petrov,” Bozer read off the screen, “thirty four year old Bulgarian mob boss and rare art connoisseur.”

Riley moved to stand behind Bozer, reading over his shoulder. Mac studied her--feet shoulder-width apart, hands behind her back. He liked to think of it as her war-room stance. The woman could save the world while standing like that. “He’s on several intelligence agencies’ watch lists,” Riley said. “Looks like he’s never been arrested, but Petrov is a power player in the Eastern European black market.” 

Raising his eyebrows, Mac slid his gaze to Desi. “You sure do know how to pick ‘em.” 

“Don’t forget, I picked you too,” she shot back. Ouch. He probably deserved that. Bozer suddenly found the computer screen extra fascinating. 

“In her defense,” Riley said, “he is really hot.” The two women shared a conspiratorial glance. If they ever really became friends, all hell would break loose.  

Matty broke the ensuing awkward tension. “Get this. He’s part of a collective of shady powerful individuals that uses black market items, real or fake, to keep tabs on all the major power players of the world--major corporations, terrorist cells, and--wait for it--intelligence agencies.” 

“Like the CIA,” Riley muttered. 

“Exactly. Someone in the group puts an item on the market just to see who comes running,” Matty explained. 

“So he thought he was pulling a fast one on a wealthy American, but…” Bozer trailed off. 

Mac delivered the final blow. “We were made the moment he saw Desi.” 

*****

This mission seemed to be one cursed piece of bad news after the next, Bozer thought. 

Petrov was going to out them as spies to the whole European criminal underworld, thus preventing them from ever doing field work again on the whole continent. They’d never be safe with Petrov’s bounty on their heads. 

If that wasn’t enough trouble, there was something weird going on with Mac and Riley. Post-Codex, Mac almost exclusively called her “Riles.” But, ever since their weird little whisper session, Mac abandoned the nickname. Bozer had no idea why. 

As if it were trying to spite him, the computer made an error noise. Bozer sarcastically imitated the sound. He didn’t feel any better. 

*****

Desi hated playing bait. She’d much rather be the one waiting in the shadows, swooping in just in the nick of time to save whoever got stuck as bait. But, noooooooo. Here she was, leaning against a wall, trying to look bored and sexy at the same time. 

It had been Bozer’s idea to have her wear the last of Riley’s dresses. This one was a skimpy, silver-sequined dress that latched onto her body like a leech. The neckline plunged below her breasts, and if it was any shorter, it’d be a shirt. It fit her well enough, except for the top. Riley’s boobs were bigger than hers, and it had taken some creative safety-pinning on Riley’s part to make the dress fit. 

To top it all off, there wasn’t a chance in hell she could hide a gun under that thing. 

“Sitting around waiting to get kidnapped, again. Best. Day. Ever.” Desi didn’t shy from making quips over comms while she waited. No one indulged her. 

Petrov’s steady, confident footsteps were her only warning before he rounded the corner. He spotted her instantly, eyes glimmering like he was starving and she was a cheeseburger on a sparkling silver platter. 

“I should’ve known better than to leave you unsupervised.” His voice was a promise of a thousand mistakes to be made. “Hello, darling. Miss me?” 

“I did until you drugged me and tied me up.” 

“I seem to recall you like being tied up.” 

She smiled but laced her words with venom. “Not that kind. Besides, I’d much rather tie you up instead.” Desi practically heard the words behind his smirk. Whatever you say, darling. 

She fought back memories bubbling to the surface as he dragged his gaze up and down her body. “That is quite the dress.” She snorted. He knew her well enough to know she would never wear a dress this ridiculous of her own free will. “I see you’ve gotten more tattoos since we last...met,” he said, innuendo dripping off the last word. His eyes traced the new designs on her arms and thighs before turning inquisitive, as if imagining what new tattoos there were in places he couldn’t see. She thought about making a snarky comment but decided against it. 

Viktor finally met her eyes again, and Desi remembered what drew her to him in the first place. His striking blue eyes were nothing like Mac’s. While Mac’s were bright and curious, Viktor’s were dark, intense, and captivating. In another time and place, she could’ve lost herself counting the green flecks in them. 

“Who are you waiting for?” he asked, likely knowing the answer already. “I assume you didn’t get all dressed up for nothing.” 

“You, actually.” 

“Is that so?” He definitely knew. 

“Yes. I’m waiting for you to give me an apology.” 

He stepped closer. “The verbal kind? Or the other kind?” 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” Desi asked dryly. She had no intention of ever getting in bed with him again, but damn he was distracting. 

 “Why? Are you seducible?” Viktor grazed his fingers up her arms, sending a shiver down her spine. He growled, “What kind of apology do you want, Desiree?” 

Desi put on a show of thinking through her options. “Both.” 

“Greedy. Your room or mine?” 

“Mine.” She had him now. Desi pushed off the wall and looped her pinky finger around his. He dutifully walked behind her, like a dog called to heel. She led him to the elevator and the trap waiting above. Okay, Riley, she thought. Your turn. 

Desi stopped at the room next door to the suite the team was using as home base and made sure Viktor was paying close attention as she slid the room key from her bra. His eyes glazed a bit, still a sucker for little things like that. Desi opened the door and waved him through. “After you.” She gave him a wicked smile, the first genuine one of their encounter. 

Not suspecting a thing--What an idiot, Desi thought--Viktor Petrov strolled into the room and found himself face to face with a scarily cold and calculating Riley, who, as far as he knew, was American businesswoman and heiress Danika Jackson. He quickly hid his surprise beneath a mask of neutrality. Lounging in a chair, Riley looked infinitely, gloriously bored. 

“I see you’ve met my bodyguard,” Riley said cooly. 

Viktor didn’t miss a beat. “Bodyguard, you say? Seems like a boring job for someone of your--” he glanced at Desi “--background.” Desi kept her face blank. He was Riley’s problem now. 

Riley began, “Mr. Petrov, as a successful businessman, I’m sure you already know that eventually, people like us outgrow the people around us. So, we must continually surround ourselves with the very best.” Riley looked him dead in the eye, cold and unfeeling. “There’s no point in carrying dead weight to the top.” She gestured to Desi. “She is far from dead weight. Besides, the private sector pays better.” Viktor didn’t notice, but Desi saw how Riley pressed her heels firmer into the floor, steeling herself for the conversation ahead. The little movement was the only sign of the Riley she knew beneath the icy exterior. 

Viktor looked a little uneasy, but he definitely wasn’t scared of the woman before him. But, by the time Riley was done with him, he would be. Riley’s eyes ignited, recognizing the challenge. 

“Now, about your little locket chip scam.” 

*****

Mac and Bozer didn’t know where this cold, calculating, and slightly insane Riley came from. They rarely got glimpses of the business side to Artemis37, but here she was, in the flesh. Mac watched the scene unfold on the computer screen, equally in awe and terrified of her. 

A woman to be feared. 

She made Matty the Hun look like a kitten. If she could see this, Matty would be proud of her. 

There was no sign of their Riley behind that cold stare. Her fingers drummed the arm of her chair. To his credit, Petrov didn’t cower. In fact, he was starting to look a little too comfortable, which was about to be a problem. 

Perhaps he needed a...demonstration. Something to make him squirm a little. 

Mac’s idea was a terrible one, and Riley would probably shoot him for it later, but it was still an idea, and Mac was pretty sure it would work. Even if he damned himself in the process. 

He just hoped she’d sincerely meant it when she said the surprise closet kiss was okay. 

“Stay here,” he said, walking to the door. 

Bozer made a face. “Okay?” Mac didn’t say anything else as the door clicked behind him. 

If Petrov was half as smart as Desi made him out to be, then he’d be monitoring footsteps in the hallway. He’d immediately know it was a set-up if Mac walked straight next door to the room Riley and Desi had Petrov cornered in. Mac forced himself to walk past the room--past Riley--to the stairwell on the opposite end of the hall, taking his time descending to three floors below. He could hear Riley’s half of the conversation over comms, but Petrov wasn’t close enough to either woman for their comms to pick up his voice. 

Mac fixated on the cold arrogance in Riley’s tone as he strode for the elevator. There wasn’t a shred of the woman he’d come to know and love in it, like she’d turned her emotions off as easily as flicking a light switch. He shivered. 

The elevator took its sweet time arriving, and in the meantime, Riley had some choice words about Pierre. The doors opened, revealing a middle-aged couple already inside. They scowled when they noticed he pressed the button for just three floors above. Mac flashed them an innocent smile. 

Mac stepped out of the elevator onto his floor, bracing himself for what he was about to do. He took heavier steps than normal, ensuring Petrov wouldn’t recognize the same pattern from before. Riley confided, once, that as a kid she would learn the pattern of people’s footsteps so she was never caught unaware. By footsteps alone, she knew who was walking down the hall--her mom, Elwood, even Jack. The variations in their gaits, she’d said, said a lot about their current state. For example, her dad’s steps normally were unhurried, but when Elwood’s walk turned heavy and prowling, it was her first warning to find somewhere to hide. And cover her ears. 

Mac’s heart snapped when Riley confessed she still did it, mostly out of habit. He swore right then and there that his kids--and hers, for that matter--would never need to learn that skill, for any reason. 

Mac swiped his key card and walked right in, ignoring Desi standing by the door in her disco ball dress. Petrov stood in the middle of the room, a healthy distance away from both women, with his hands in his pockets. He had the casual posture of a man who was used to being the most powerful person in a room. The man exuded wealth, from his perfectly tailored suit to his immaculate leather shoes. 

And then Mac saw Riley. 

The video feed he’d been watching didn’t do her justice. She lounged in an antique chair like it was her throne, the hotel suite her court. Her navy blue gown pooled at her feet, and her black acrylic nails gave the illusion of claws or talons drumming the armrests, not human fingers. 

Mac dragged his gaze higher. 

Her hair tumbled down her bare shoulders, no longer wild and windswept. No, this Riley was a far cry from the woman who’d cackled while speeding down foreign streets in a stolen Lamborghini convertible. This Riley was polished, cold, and looked like she was debating skinning Petrov alive. 

Her dark eyes, usually so full of laughter and compassion, held the vast, black emptiness of the space between stars. They were black holes, consuming everything in their path. 

She was otherworldly, predatory, and very, very sexy. 

Mac started to banish the thought from his brain, but he reconsidered. He was here to play the role of scandalous boyfriend, after all. 

He let every more-than-friendly thought he’d ever had about Riley turn his expression ravenous. Musings and memories of her flashed in his mind. The way her laugh warmed him from the inside out. The way she sat too close and furrowed her brow while she thoroughly beat him at any and every video game. The way her ass looked in one of the bazillion pairs of skin-tight jeans she owned. 

He didn’t care if she saw the truth in his eyes. Didn’t care if she read his feelings like a book. 

Some part of him wanted her to see the truth of it all, glimmering just underneath the fake-boyfriend façade. 

Mac wanted her to see how he never wanted to be with anyone else when shit hit the fan. How their middle-of-the-night fridge meetings were the only thing holding him together sometimes. How he was brimming with pride every time she improvised, whether in the field or at home. How one of her smiles made all coherent thoughts vanish from his head. How he’d wanted to ravish her the moment she dragged him into that damn closet. How--

Petrov cleared his throat. 

Mac blinked slowly and slid his gaze to the mob boss, feigning surprise. “Oh! I didn’t realize you had company. My apologies.” Riley’s eyes glittered like she knew just how not-sorry Mac was. 

He changed his mind. They weren’t just pools of darkness between stars. Those eyes contained the whole fucking universe. Black holes, galaxies, supernovas, and everything in between. 

He stalked toward her, trying to convey his plan with just his eyes. For a brief second, understanding flashed in her eyes before a cruel smile curled her lips--practically the first time all night they were on the same page. Mac revealed his relief for only a split second. He mouthed, Can I kiss you? Riley tilted her jaw, baring her neck to him. She didn’t need to utter a single word for him to understand. Make Petrov squirm, but don’t ruin my lipstick this time. 

It killed Mac to do this to her twice, but he didn’t have a better plan. He hadn’t touched her at all since the closet, as if that would ever make up for what he did. Now here he was, silently begging her to re-enact the closet scene. He didn’t know what that made him. A douchebag, most likely. 

Playing like this was like dangling their real feelings over a blazing inferno, hoping they didn’t do any irreversible damage. At least this time, Mac had Riley’s consent. If she said no, he would’ve found some other way to get under Petrov’s skin. 

Bracing his hands on Riley’s forearms, Mac pressed featherlight kisses to her neck. His thumb brushed a thin scar he didn’t know she had. Lingering traces of her perfume filled his nose, his lungs. He trailed his lips across her skin, searching for her pulse. Upon finding it, he pressed his lips firmly against her neck, reveling in the sensation of her blood roaring beneath his mouth. 

His blood roared alongside hers. This is just a game, he reminded himself. A power play to disarm Petrov. He nipped her skin, then soothed the small hurt with his tongue. Her breath hitched. Mac’s self-control hung by a thread. Riley was intoxicating, and getting drunk on her and losing his head would only land them in even more trouble. 

He pulled back. “I’m going to take a shower. Feel free to join me when you’re done here.” Mac winked. 

“If you want me against a wall, Damon, I’d much rather it be somewhere you can fuck me hard enough to make the paintings fall off.” 

Riley wore a mask of quiet, glittering amusement, but it was all Mac could do not to combust on the spot. He couldn’t believe she said that. He’d started this little game, and she always played to win, but...shit. 

This woman was going to bring him to his fucking knees. 

With as much bravado as he could muster, he replied, “We can do both.” Mac pressed a chaste kiss to the back of her hand before walking into the bathroom, closing the door, and taking the coldest shower of his life. 

*****

Petrov squirmed like a worm on a hook while he was forced to watch her and Mac’s little show. The way Mac had practically fucked her with his eyes made Riley want to squirm too. But, like, good squirming. Maybe even the kind that ended with her head thrown back and sheets clenched between her fingers. 

But, Danika Jackson didn’t squirm. Her heart didn’t feel like it was about to explode. She didn’t have to memorize every press of her man’s lips against her neck, because for her, this moment was real and would happen again. She needed to be Danika, who was calm and cunning, not Riley, whose heart was breaking, because this was just a game, and Mac meant none of it. 

That quick kiss on her hand nearly undid her. Petrov, thankfully, had been too busy staring at the floor to catch the cracks in her façade. She focused back on Petrov, pretending her heart wasn’t pounding and her brain wasn’t short circuiting. 

Riley stared at him, putting on a show of contemplating throwing him out right then and there so she could join Mac in the shower. It wasn’t hard. She was definitely thinking about it. 

Finally, she got back to the matter at hand. “As I was saying, I don’t appreciate you kidnapping my employee or trying to pull a fast one on someone clearly smarter than you.” She paused. “Why.” It was a command, not a question. 

Petrov glanced at Desi. “What has she told you about me?” He almost sounded nervous. A bit of Riley’s terror eased, but only a bit. You’ve got this, she reminded herself. 

“Everything. I know about the career that makes you happy, the career that pays the bills, and I know about your little black market spy collective, although I was surprised to learn your products aren’t as high quality as advertised.” Riley sneered. This was a gamble, she knew, showing her hand like this. She really hoped it paid off. 

Petrov snapped his head to Desi, looking vaguely horrified. “You knew about that?” Desi gave him a not-so-innocent shrug. 

Before he could say anything else, Riley continued. “Why is your collective watching me and my company, Mr. Petrov?”

He shifted his weight from one foot to another, clearly debating something in his head. “I wasn’t actually watching you at all,” he conceded. “I believe there is a mole in my operation, a spy.” 

Riley arched an eyebrow. “Interesting.” Behind him, Desi narrowed her eyes. 

“I made sure knowledge of the sale fell on select ears and waited to see which agency made an appearance. And sure enough, none other than my favorite spy shows up.” He smirked at Desi. 

“Ex-spy,” Riley corrected. “Although, I have been known to use her skills when I need information, or something done under the radar, if you catch my drift.” She knew what he was doing. Petrov made a calculated risk in revealing his potential mole problem. One slip-up on her part and he could easily connect the dots between his CIA mole and them. The best she could do now was convince him that she--and Desi--were just as shady and well-connected as him. “I assume you are responsible for the building being on lockdown?” 

“Can’t have my customers running away without paying, now can I?” She’d caught him off guard before, but he was back on his game now. Dammit. 

“Here’s the deal. You will call off your dogs and let us and everyone else leave the hotel, and in exchange I will return your locket and won’t expose you as a fraud.” He scoffed. “I am a woman of my word, Mr. Petrov.” 

“And if I don’t agree?” 

Her response was out of her mouth before Riley even knew what she was saying. “Then I will use my recording of this conversation to clone your voice and command your men to stand down myself before throwing your useless body out the window and taking bets on which direction your blood will spray when you splatter on the pavement.” Riley stared him down, swallowing her horror at her gruesome threat. She was pretty sure she was going to puke the second he was out of the room. 

“Very well,” he agreed, taken aback. Petrov cast a nervous glance in Desi’s direction. There was no pity in her smoldering eyes. None. 

Riley pulled the locket out of her bra and dangled it from her hand, waiting. Petrov took the hint and quickly made a phone call. “I have the locket. Stand down.” Satisfied, Riley handed him the locket in dismissal. 

She wasn’t going to say anything more, but the entitled way he raked his gaze up Desi’s body on his way out the door had Riley opening her mouth one more time, just to piss him off. “Good luck with your mole problem, Viktor.” 

The door shut, and seconds later a nod from Desi confirmed he’d walked down the hall and was out of earshot. 

Walking in on Mac be damned, Riley sprinted into the bathroom and hurled her guts into the toilet. 

[recurring-polynya]

I’m a huge RenRuki fan so I’m stoked to find this page of glorious work and active engagement relating to this topic I could go on about! I was wondering... during their separation, do you think Renji and Rukia slept with/dated other people? One more than the other? Just wanna know your insight since you put so much depth into their relationship. I love it. (I personally like to think that Renji had a bit of a “hoe phase” especially while he was in the 11th)

Tumblr is so great, I can’t believe people actually value my opinion on this stuff (this is absolutely one of my favorite topics). Thank you so much for your kind words, and I am ecstatic for the opportunity to pontificate on this topic.

Just to clarify, if you were asking for my opinion on the source material, and I had to “support my opinion” or “cite references”, my actual interpretation of canon is that no, they were absolutely celibate during this time. Rukia had a cute li’l crush on her vice-captain and Renji probably went on one very heterosexual date with a girl once and felt bad about it for a year.

When I am being generous and world-buildy, I like to consider the fact that shinigami are souls. They do not have bodies or hormones and so I can get behind the idea that bonds of family and friendship are far more important than sex and attraction, because those are fundamentally earthly concerns. In the hands of a thoughtful, talented, preferably ace writer, this could be an incredibly interesting setting but that is, uh, not consistent with any other aspect of Soul Society, including the fact that they sell sexy calendars of the captains, plus Kubo took the time out to canonically remind us that Soul Reapers poop and have babies.

So, instead, here is the horny Polynya headcanon version, which is what you probably wanted anyway. I’m putting it under a cut because it gets a little R-rated, and also it’s hella long, but the short answer is Renji absolutely had a slutty phase.

Some people headcanon that Rukia and Renji were actually in a romantic relationship at the time of her adoption, and if that’s your reading of it, and you want to believe that they waited for each other out of loyalty, I suppose I can get behind that.

I don’t think they were together, though. I waver from time to time about how physical their affection got in Rukongai, but I think they fell in love and never admitted it. When their last friend died, they both became absolutely terrified of losing the other, so they came to the Seireitei in order to get strong and not die. I don’t think Rukia ever wanted to be Soul Reaper, to be honest. Given the strength of her principles and her particular moral code, I do think she is a great one, in the style of “I would never want to be in a club that would have me in it.” Consistent with Oetsu’s trial in the Royal Realm, I think Renji was born (died?) to be a Soul Reaper and Rukia knew this and also that he would never go unless she went with him. She absolutely regarded getting him into Shin’ou as saving his life and getting him where he belonged.

Once they were in school, I think they had to keep their distance socially if they wanted to succeed. The Gotei runs entirely on nepotism, and Rukongai kids who don’t adapt are looking at Squad 11 or 4, best case scenario. Even if they were aware of their feelings for each other, they had to play it cool for now. Renji is a long-term planner, and I think he set his sights on pass tests -> graduate -> get Gotei position -> live happily ever after with Rukia. Rukia is not so good at long term planning, and also not so good at formal education and I think she just got depressed and salty, especially because she was never sure if he actually returned her feelings or not. I absolutely think that when she accepted the adoption, she assumed she was leaving Renji to his live his best life, and at least going somewhere she was wanted.

Even though we, the reader, are presented this story as a tragedy, in many ways, this is exactly what they had hoped for. They lived. That’s it. That’s all they ever wanted. Renji got to have his perfect job and Rukia got to live in indescribable luxury. They are both so, so happy about this and have no idea why their faces are so wet right now.

The last thing either of them wants, to be honest, is the other one pining after them. They have each accepted trudging through their life in misery because they think they have made the other happy. There’s a scene were Byakuya shows up to the Squad 6 holding cells to announce to Rukia that he has no plans to save her, and Renji looks just devastated, not just because Rukia’s gonna die, but because he thought he was sending her to happiness.

Also, on a meta level, I am middle aged, and for me, the romance of only ever being with one person is boring as hell. The idea that they would get together and lose their virginity to each other just makes me indescribably tired. Childhood-friends-to-lovers isn’t actually that interesting to me-- it is the separation itself that makes it spicy-- that they went off and had other life experiences-- and sexual experiences, and came back found that they loved this person even more now.

I headcanon Rukia as very horny and pro-sex in theory, but has is a big problem of opportunity. On one hand, I think she and Byakuya have a firm don’t-ask-don’t-tell policy, where as long as she stays out of the gossip columns, he doesn’t care what she does. On the other hand, though, I feel like secret affairs are kinda hard to manage, especially since she entered the noble network late in life. Anyway, I figure she’s had a number of casual affairs, mostly with other nobles who are invested in not getting caught, and also do not have any interest in any sort of emotional attachment. I think Rukia is absolutely bi, and mostly slept with ladies because they were more likely to be discreet, although there was probably a dude or two in there somewhere. Rukia only has two relatinship modes-- detached and ride-or-die, and she was very careful to keep everything in category 1, because she had no expectation of ever having a functional relationship that would go anywhere; no one she was actually interesting in being with would ever pass Kuchiki muster. I think she tried dating a nice boy from Squad 8 once, and everyone in Squad 13 thought it was the cutest thing they had ever seen. They went on three dates and never kissed and Rukia hated it and never did it again. She let herself have a huge crush on both Kaien and Miyako Shiba, because she was absolutely sure it could never go anywhere, and that definitely played into her devastation at their death. She may have had some Bad Decisions Sex in the wake of that, but I think for the most part, the affairs became more trouble than they were worth, and she’s been on a pretty long dry spell around the time we meet her.

That being said, I think Rukia is a lady who takes care of herself, if you get my drift. I think she has an extensive collection of erotic romance novels, a good imagination, and Kuchiki money worth of self-service sex toys. I think by the time she and Renji actually hook up, she has decades worth of pent up fantasies, and fortunately for her, he is intrigued by her ideas and would like to sign up for her newsletter, please and thank you.

Speaking of Renji, let’s talk about Renji! After Rukia left, I think Renji Made Some Plans and buckled down into a long, hard haul of Making Himself Worthy of Seeing Rukia Again. He made it through school, he went into Squad 5 with Izuru and Momo and... lost 90% of his momentum. This is exactly the scenario of the kid who busts ass through college to follow their dream, and then two years into their dream job, realizes that they are going to be formatting pivot tables in Excel for the next 15 years before they get to do anything remotely interesting. At this point, Renji is young, hot, bisexual, inked, and not very satisfied with his day job, and Thus Began the Ho Period.

Momo and Izuru hate this. They hate it so much. They have both had big crushes on Renji since school and they are right there. It wouldn’t be so bad if he would find a nice sweet partner that they like, but no, he just goes off on weeknights and comes home reeking of alcohol and covered in hickeys and ruining his career even though his job performance is actually fine. The fact is, even though he has always acted like he doesn’t know, of course he knows they like him, he’s not dumb, but Izuru and Momo are the type of people who mate for life, and Renji absolutely knows how badly he would break their hearts. He can’t even talk about it with them, all he can do it pretend like he doesn’t notice and hope they’ll realize what trash he is. He still loves Rukia and will always love Rukia and has made peace with the idea that he will likely never get to be with her-- he’s still working towards it because he must, because it would kill him to give up, but he knows that he’s only good for a fight or a fuck and not much else. Their friendship gets increasingly strained until Momo and Izuru can’t understand anything he does and he can’t stand them caring so damn much.

Anyway, this escalates in deciding to leave Nice, Respectable Squad 5 entirely, and joining the French Foreign Legion Squad 11. Squad 11 respects a man’s right to wallow, and Renji takes a swan dive to rock bottom. His only saving grace is his training with Ikkaku, which he takes absolutely seriously. Yumichika eventually takes interest in Renji, and teaches him how to take care of his hair and have standards. Yumichika and Ikkaku realize that if they can make him Functional, they can get him to do paperwork, so they help him beat the Sixth Seat and let him start hanging out with their friends.

Renji is still sleeping around at this point, but at least he’s sleeping around with a better class of people. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, Polynya, has Matsumoto ever pegged Renji? (You probably weren’t actually thinking that) The answer is yes, Matsumoto has absolutely pegged Renji, and she was utterly delighted to give Rukia tips later on. Rukia does not begrudge Renji his slutty period in the least, because she knows that, given the opportunity, she probably would have been Worse, and also, he’s slept with 3/4 of the Gotei and picked her out of all of them, and also, he’s just incredible at oral.

The slutty phase tapered off when Renji had a bit of an actual relationship with Shuuhei. First of all, they are absolutely each other’s types, physically. Secondly, Shuuhei (whom I headcanon as significantly less pathetic and more bisexual than in canon) would be able to handle being in a relationship that is fun and supportive, even if it’s not destined to last. He is well aware that Renji is devoted to beating Captain Kuchiki and that he’s never going to truly be able to be in love with anyone until he gets some closure with Rukia, but that’s a long way off, and Shuuhei’s got his own baggage, who doesn’t have baggage? So they sleep together and go to the bar together and hold hands sometimes and tool around on the motorbike and wear a lot of leather and Hisagi cooks Renji food and Renji eats it and they’re pretty happy for a few years.

Eventually, around the time he gets serious about trying to make vice-captain, Renji starts to hang out with Izuru and Momo again, who have recently made vice-captain themselves, and are really happy to see that he’s gotten himself back on the wagon. He’s started thinking about Rukia a lot again, and he’s feeling a little bad because he loves Shuuhei, but he’s not in love with Shuuhei, and also, Shuuhei and Izuru have started looking at each other when they go out drinking, so Renji claims he needs to concentrate on the vice-captain’s exam and they have some nice breakup sex and then he sliiiiiides on outta there like a good bro and is very happy for his friends when they start hooking up.

Did that cover it? Boy, I had a lot of thoughts on that, huh? To summarize: They both saw other people. Renji had way more sex, just a tremendous amount of sex, but always carried a torch for Rukia (not really intentionally, I think he would have liked to be able to get over her, he just couldn’t), whereas I think she really did give up on him for a while.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk, please read my fanfiction, where I am constantly hinting at all this stuff, I swear I will eventually finish that Squad 11 story.

[dragonnan]

16, 17 and 19 for the most recent ask thingy, should you feel the mood sway you. 😁

The mood will ALWAYS sway me lol!

16. Describe your WIP that currently has the highest word count.

Simon and Simon and Psych (Psych/Simon & Simon) Word count: 24,323

So this one, in spite of not being updated in YEARS, is a story I’m still absolutely on fire to resume because I’m just thrilled af about the concept. It’s a crossover between 2 series I love - Psych and Simon & Simon (an 80s Private Detective series).  What excites me most about it was the reimagining of Simon & Simon for the modern era while still retaining all of the things that made the characters what they were.  

A little back story on Simon & Simon as I feel more people will be less familiar with that series of the two.  The series is about 2 brothers who decided to open a detective agency together after the younger brother, AJ (Andrew Jackson), left the larger detective agency where he had been working for several years.  

AJ is blond, surfed a great deal as a younger man, attended law school, and was considered the “golden child” growing up somewhat sheltered and cherished and maybe a tad innocent of the world.  When his brother went to Viet Nam, AJ took part in the peace protests - primarily because he was terrified for his brother and wanted to do anything he could to make the fighting stop.  AJ tends to be the more mature of the brothers - nearly always wearing a suit and usually takes lead in dealing with clients (assuming Rick doesn’t interrupt him).  

Rick, the older brother, left home after they father died and bounced around from various interests, including being a biker for a time, before going to Viet Nam.  He would come back from the war with a boatload of PTSD and a very fierce drive to protect his younger brother (probably far more so than he’d even felt prior to Viet Nam but to be clear - Rick is VERY protective of AJ).  All of that, however, might take the casual observer by surprise as Rick is incredibly irresponsible (on the surface) and nearly always in a good mood or quick with a joke.  Just don’t threaten baby bro other their mother.  Really, just do not.   

So that’s a bit of backstory so I can mention my changes for the modern era.  Instead of Viet Nam, Rick is now a veteran of Desert Storm.  They now both carry cell phones instead of relying on pay phones or other land lines.  They have a website.  I’ve updated their cars.  Before, AJ drove a red Camaro T Top so I changed that to a 2008 Chevy Corvette.  Rick, in the series, drove a 1979 Dodge Power Wagon so that one... did not change lol!  I seriously cannot picture Rick in any other vehicle. 

So after ALL OF THAT there’s actually a story in progress...

The plot thus far is that the Simon brothers are in Santa Barbara because AJ is running in the annual Half Marathon (an actual one cause I do like to blend some real events with my fiction lol).  While in town, Rick goes to run an errand - picking up an item his buddy Carlos had shipped but wasn’t able to pick up himself because Carlos is... sketchy (an actual character from the series that we hear about anecdotally from Rick).  Meanwhile, Juliet and Lassiter are at the shipyards as well, having set up a sting on suspicion of drug activity.  So, of course, when Rick goes to collect this item for Carlos, he ends up being stopped by the cops who confiscate the item after finding it filled with drugs and they arrest Rick.  THIS, then, is how the crossover comes into play as Shawn, of course, horns in on the investigation and immediately suspects that Rick is being setup so he volunteers to help out the Simons.  Various things happen which ultimately leads Shawn, Gus, and AJ back to the shipyards and a suspicious warehouse (aren’t ALL warehouses suspicious?) where suspicious men are rapidly emptying it of product.  The 3 men get caught and are bundled off in the back of a suspicious vehicle to a suspicious location.  At about this time Rick is let out on bail (thanks moooom....) and in a panic as he hasn’t heard from his brother.  When he realizes AJ must be in trouble, he ends up tentatively joining up with Juliet and Lassiter who are trying to find Shawn. Nobody is entirely thrilled with being teamed up in either group...

And this is roughly where things stand after the last update!     

So after I’ve subjected you to all of the above, how about a snippet from chapter 1?

___

Shawn Spencer spun slowly in his father's chair – maintaining just enough speed to make a full revolution before kicking himself into another circuit.  Typically he enjoyed his time at the station, provided he wasn't behind bars or being subjected to an interrogation.  Okay, scratch that.  He did enjoy an interrogation provided his hot pants girlfriend with a personal pair of handcuffs was the one dressing him down.  He leered. He didn't even have to try to make that sound dirty.  

Right.  Back on the subject at hand. Naughty cop Jules would, sadly, have to wait until they could have some private time.

If they could have some private time.  Of course, the way things were going lately...

And that brought him back full circle to his original beef.

Dad was being cagey. Like, Nick Cagey complete with diminished mane and sneaky covertness. Sure, he pretended he wasn't being covert but his dad sucked almost as bad as Lassie when he tried to fake acting casual. He was way too sour in the shorts to pull off that level of none chalice.

Like now, the old man was going for coffee. Like anybody with half a badge couldn't see right through that act. Shawn pulled together a mild sneer as his dad returned to his desk.

“Really? You put sugar in that too?”

His dad didn't look at him as he set his coffee on the desk. “Stop glaring at me. And get the hell out of my chair!”

Shawn didn't budge. “I am on to you.” He enunciated with immaculate exaggeration.

“The only thing you're on is my chair. And too many Pop Rocks; I thought Gus had cut you back to one pack a day.”

“I'm allowed two packs on the weekend.”

“It's Wednesday, kiddo. Maybe it's time you invested in a calendar.”

“Well maybe it's time you invested in hair plugs!” Shawn paused as his father crossed his arms. The pointing hand dropping back to his lap. “Too Terence Stamp? Sorry, I was caught up in the moment.”

“What do you want, Shawn?”  Giving up on patience, Henry opted for shoving his son until he toppled out of the chair.  Ignoring the yelp when Shawn flopped to the tile, he scooted closer to the desk so he could pull up the report he'd been working on.  Fingers just coming to rest on his keyboard, he scowled at the active game of Pitfall taking up his screen.  He tapped a button but rather than taking him back to the SBPD mainframe, it caused the character to jump into the green shapes he assumed were meant to be alligators.  Behind him, Shawn gasped.

“You just killed my last guy!”

“Be grateful that's all I've killed.” Slapping a few more keys he finally found the right combination to get back to his report.  

Still sitting on the floor, Shawn drew up his knees up and propped his chin on both fists.  Not even managing to type a single word, Henry sighed and swiveled towards his moping son.

“What, Shawn?”

Now that he had the desired attention, Shawn pushed his lower lip out the tiniest bit.  “Jules is busy and she said I can't help with the stakeout cause it's “super stupid important, Shawn” and Gus won't let me borrow the blueberry so I can follow her cause deep down inside I know she wants me to help cause, please, like I don't always make a stakeout better – I mean, who else is going to remember to bring an extra container of cheese dip for the nachos because one cup is just never enough and believe you me you do not want to short cheese a guy packing tear gas...”

Henry held up a hand to cut off the ramble that could easily go on another five minutes.  With his other hand he rubbed at his aching eyes.  Of course Shawn would find out about the sting.  However, Chief Vick had been adamant about keeping him out of it.  Henry had actually lobbied for including his son on the details – the memory of the last big operation that had temporarily cost him his job was not an easily healing wound.  Rather than even attempt reconstructing the word barrage of bitching, Henry latched on to the least pointless detail.

“Where is Gus anyhow?  I thought you two left an hour ago for dinner.”

Shawn shrugged.  “I don't know for certain...  I mean, by now he could be anywhere.  He's always expressed an interest in touring with Alicia Keys...”

“Shawn.”

“We went to Taco Louie's and he insisted on the deep fried beef and bean mini burrito...”

Henry raised his hand again.  Enough said.

“Well whatever you were thinking, I'm still not talking the Chief out of her decision.  You're bored?  How about you work on the burglary case I gave you.”

“Daaaad... the Redbox robberies?” Groaning, Shawn flopped on his back and sprawled dramatically. Officers passing back and forth shot glances at the display and Henry rubbed his face in embarrassment.

“Dammit, Shawn, get off the floor! You look like an idiot!”

Shawn sat up but didn't stand.  Nor was he ready to let go of his latest complaint.

“Come on!  Dad, Redbox?  That is so... not sexy!”

17. Describe a fic that is still in the ‘ideas’ stage.

This one is an Iron Man character exploration regarding Tony’s relationship with Obie and that, with hindsight, he realizes Obie had been grooming him.  It will never cross that crucial line but the potential leaves Tony reeling.  This will be in the same universe as another short fic titled “Simple Math”.  Here’s the bit of writing I’d put together so far:

_____

He'd thought it was bonding; at the time.  His dad had never been one for just hanging out; shooting the shit; telling tales out of school.  No, Pops, when he bothered to interact, led with questions.  “You keeping your grades up?” “You still seeing that floozy?” “When are you going to pull your head out of your ass and grow the hell up?” “You do realize it's my name you're disgracing every time you go on a bender?”

With Obie it was just, easy.  Obie might ask about school but it was always with approval and pride.  He would discuss Tony's conquests as though Tony had climbed Kilimanjaro wearing nothing but underwear and a cape.    

Obie was there when his father wasn't. Which meant that Obie was always there.  The first time he got astoundingly drunk on his father's scotch, Obie was the one to help him hunch over the toilet and vomit expensive, aged booze into the toilet.  Obie was also the one to replace the depleted bottle to keep Howard in the dark.  For a fourteen year old kid still trying to gain his dad's favor, that had meant everything.

He saw his first porn with Obie; sex education ala Traci Lords, three months shy of his fifteenth birthday.  That was the same time he was introduced to weed.  Obie had cautioned him to use it sparingly; didn't want to fry that genius brain, he'd say, and ruffle his hair.  The porn had made him uncomfortable.  Obie had turned it off and told him they could watch whatever Tony wanted.  They'd ended up changing the station to Knight Rider; smoking and munching Cheetos and laughing over their orange fingers.

It was Obie who was there, arm around his shoulders, after his parents died.  He desperately didn't want to sob in front of the man.  Things were so complicated with his dad that all he felt was blinding guilt... as though some part of him had caused this.  But Obie had filled him with bourbon until the emotions got soft around the edges and he'd sat beside the older man, head tipping gradually to the right until he was held up by Obie's bicep. Obie had just slung and arm around him and let Tony pass out while he rubbed a broad hand up and down his arm.

It was strange, now, looking back with adult perspective.  A perspective that included Afghanistan and his intended execution and Obie's arm around his shoulders while he talked about legacy and responsibility while Tony's lungs slowly seized.  He'd taken the time to sit there – arm around Tony's shoulders while one broad hand traveled up and down Tony's bicep – just like when he was a kid and Obie was the whole world.

He'd tried to remember if it had felt so tainted... at the time.  Or if he'd always believed it was love.

Obie had never quite crossed that line. Though hindsight offered a peek into that possibility with enough clarity Tony had fought with his cramping gut for nearly thirty minutes.  He'd staved off vomiting though he was fairly certain his dignity had still been in tatters what with Bruce wandering in on his misery.

19. What’s your favorite character headcanon?

Gosh... It’s funny that when asked the question the first thing that I ponder is “what head canons?? what are characters??? Do I even watch tv???” So I needed to ponder a bit.

As far as it goes my favorite head canons are not typically ones that I myself have come up with.  And going with that maybe the best one I know is for the series, and character, Sherlock.

I’m am 100% all in on Sherlock being on the autism spectrum.  Yes, I know this is attributed to MANY characters but consider the fact that those reasons have a ton of validity.  Sherlock has very strong indications of being on the spectrum and having read quite a number of essays on the subject, many of which were written by people who are also on the spectrum, I’m completely convinced.  It’s to the point I don’t even like calling it a “head canon” as that implies it’s only a fan concept and therefore has less likelihood.  It just feels so deliberate with that character.  

So going off from that I would say, in a more general sense, my favorite head canons are they type where we can discover neurologically atypical traits in characters - especially heroes.  Too long anyone neurologically divergent is portrayed either as a victim or, FAR FAR worse, as the “crazed villain” and frankly that is disgusting.  So it is beyond refreshing to suddenly have this amazing, brilliant, layered person who also displays autistic traits.  In going back over characters that I’ve loved most there are many who have traits of this sort that, only in hindsight, do I recognize.  Just a few off the top of my head; Malcolm Bright, Shawn Spencer (100% ADHD), Rapunzel, Rick Simon (remember him? lol), Adrien Monk (his OCD was very deliberate), as well as characters who’ve developed trauma after horrific events such as, well, most MCU characters but particularly Tony Stark and Stephen Strange.  Malcolm Bright also very much was built from trauma but I also am convinced there are neurologically atypical traits at play.  

Thank you so much for the great ask!!        

[alexiela73]

Hello, I love your work! Can I request headcannons Soldier76, Reaper and Mcree getting piss drunk and dancing seductively/with stripping for their reader crush?

Mmm Dunno what happened here. McCree was my favorite to write. Poor boys. Not even poor McCree can hold his liquor. And Reaper learned the hard way that you should not make bets with women.

Soldier 76: 

Doesn’t drink often

Not because he thinks drinking is stupid

As a man full of paranoia who spent a good chunk of years looking over his shoulder, he is always high on alert

Alcohol…does not help his thinking, nor his ability to handle being in battle

So this is the first time he’s drunk is a very, very long time

Did not mean to drink as much as he did

Started as one shot, turned to four shots, and by the time he hit 10 he’d lost count

Everyone was at a private club celebrating a victory against Talon 

You were sitting with him, giggling as you drank your third scotch. You weren’t really drunk, but it was fun to watch him. Despite being drunk, he didn’t slur a single syllable when he spoke, and he almost sounded sober

Except he was asking inappropriate questions of people or letting loose his thoughts of some people that usually he bottled up

Deciding to distract him before Soldier could find himself in a fight, you asked him to dance.

The two of you went out onto the dance floor, the music blaring and colorful lights flashing all around

The dancing was good at first, and your body moved with the rhythm of the music

Soldiers…didn’t

Your face went rather red when you felt his hands slide down your sides, pulling you in close to him to dance intimately and wildly together

You didn’t know how you felt about this, although you somewhat liked how his hands held your hips

Until he let go and you realized that he was starting to strip

“JACK!” you cried, barely heard over the music and you had to struggle to pull his hands away from the belt of his pants, having managed to strip off his shirt already

“It’s too hot in here!” he tried to yell over the music, struggling with you.

Finally he instead pulled you close and you found yourself pressed to the long, hard length of his body

It was kind of hard to breath. You’d never been so close to a male before

“Your really beautiful, did you know that?” he managed to yell over the music to you.

Face heating up as his body rubbed yours, still moving with the music, you couldn’t tell if he’d said it because he was drunk or because he meant it

When Angela and Ana saw that Jack had stripped off his shirt in the middle of the dance floor and was looking ready to rip off your clothes too, they intervened and convinced him to go home with Reinhardt to retire early

You decided drunk Soldier was a fun soldier 

Reaper:

Does not drink

Mostly because there is no fun in drinking for him anymore

The amount of alcohol he has to consume just to get drunk is astounding

And most alcohol just tastes downright terrible, so he just wasn’t in the mood of trying

Except then you challenged him. The deal was whoever gets drunk first has to be personal slave to the other for a day

For Reaper, the idea of you as his ‘slave’ sounded rather hot

You liked the idea of being able to command the great Reaper for a whole day

So in the end he agreed, figuring he would win since his cell’s usually didn’t died and regenerated too fast for the alcohol to make it through the blood stream

The two of you really went at it, and slowly he was growing more and more astonished with your alcohol tolerance

What he didn’t know was you were raised in a house hold of boys where drinking games were the top of the priority list

Reaper was the first one who slurred his words

“Thisss is ridiculousss,” he muttered, slamming a glass down on the table and glaring at you

He didn’t notice how he slowly seemed to sway back and forth a bit, as if unable to keep his balance even in the chair

“It is NOT,” you said, your voice thick. God, your stomach was not feeling good after so much liquor, and you could feel your body and mind growing heavy

But you had to stay aware to win the game

Your slavery-hood depended on it

A few more drinks and Reaper’s head was on the table, fuzzy

The two of you were hiccupping and giggling over the silliest things. Oh yes, Reaper was giggling. About normal, stupid things like how your sneeze was a loud little mouse squeak

Sombra later came in news for Reaper and first screamed, before cursing heavily in Spanish and covering her eyes. “What the FUCK are you DOING, GABE?!” she practically yelled.

You were giggling and clapping in a chair, and Reaper was doing a strip tease for you, dancing to Over the Rainbow in  the movie Wizard of Oz. 

Nothing has ever disturbed her as much as the sight she found there

Neither of you seemed to realize the issue, and it took Sombra an hour to convince both of you it was important for Reaper to put his clothes back on 

And that Over the Rainbow was a terrible song to use for a strip tease

When the two of you were eventually sober the next day, Reaper wouldn’t come out of his room for hours, remembering every painful second of his drunkness and the horrors that came with strip dancing in front of his crush

You won the drinking medal too.

You thoroughly enjoyed that day with him as your personal slave ;) 

Mostly because he spent his day in the sexy bunny suite

McCree:

Was the one who told you it’d be a good idea to go drinking

As a cowboy, whiskey is his love and life

Y’know, other then you of course

Not that you know that…. but he’s busy working on trying to get himself out of the friend zone.

Which is apparently difficult as hell

So the two of you are drinking and you end up caught in a game of poker

Jesse finds himself a part of a drinking gamble

At first he has to think about it. Chance getting drunk when he’s trying to impress you? Or impress you by winning AND getting money to go buy you pretty things?

Thus, the game ensued.

Thirty minutes later you go to search for Jesse, pretty proud of yourself for winning two-hundred dollars in poker when you started off with twenty.

You found him at the counter, slouched over at the counter, cheek on his arm

He was in a daze, and when you poked him he jolted up, looking like a startled filly

“Wha…oh….izzz you….Heyz darlin’…” he drawled, giving you what he thought was a seductive smile but was actually his face twitching into a wince

“My god, you drunk. I thought it almost impossible,” you said in amusement, crossing your arms.

Immediately the cowboy copied you, albeit sloppily. “Why do ya always look soooooooooooo serioussssssss,” Jesse drawled, accent thick and his words as sloppy as his posture

You rolled your eyes but suddenly he perked up and got off his stool

Taking your hand, he pulled you toward the dance floor

You were worried about whether he could stand upright even

“Lets dance, beautiful!” Jesse cried, and started to dance…except while the song was a slow song, he started jumping and bouncing about as if listening to heavy rock

“Jesse…maybe we should go home,” you said gently, touching his arm

God….so many people…were looking at the two of you…

Jesse whipped his hair around, losing his hat, before he looked back at you, blinking slowly

“Oh…..OH. I get it,” he said, managing a lazy, drunken smile. “You don’t want to rock it…you want me to dance…like that…”

Concern immediately filled your face. What was that going to be?

Suddenly Jesse made this weird face, like he was concentrating too much, before he slowly started toward you

You started to back up, but his steps were longer

Spinning, he turned, crouched and TWERKED

Fear rolled through you. Holy shit, what was going on

Jesse was unbuttoning his shirt slowly, playing with it as he danced and rubbed his butt against you

He bent over, as if literally asking you to slap his butt

“Jesse…I’m begging you…please…stop,” you said, already hurriedly dialing Ana for help

Jesse snatched the phone from you with a wicked, slow grin and you jumped, trying to get it

“You want it back, baby? Come get it!” he said, slipping it into his pants and underwear. “I know you want to!”

Faintly you could hear from the phone in his pants, “Hello?”

Jesse giggled. “Oops. I might have dialed Ana by accident. Hi mom!” he yelled at his pants. “Your in my underwear!!!” The whole bar was silently staring at you both in stunned silence

Enough was enough. 

15 minutes later, the two of you were in a taxi on your way home. Jesse had passed out four seconds into getting put in the taxi. You had to tip the bartender $30 for Jesse’s screaming in the restaurant

You stroked the hair from his face,  his head in your lap, and you sighed.

You couldn’t figure out what on earth about this man appealed to you, but god only knows he did.

You refused to go drinking with him ever again though.

[ohcaptaintarthister]

Everyone Has Secrets by Ellaria

FridayFabFic No. 1

Despite my intent to find the positive in the negative, there were some people rubbed wrong about my FridayFabFic. There are only two apologies I’ll be making: I’m sorry I don’t like your stories, and I’m sorry most of the stories I like are old. I stand by what I said about the current state of A LOT of JB fanfics but you should REMEMBER it’s only my opinion–ONE PERSON! I have no wish to be queen bee or anything (unlike some people). I don’t encourage people to have troll accounts so they can leave awful comments on works they don’t like and happily report to others their success at shooting down an author who only wanted to write differently. That’s a well-known fact about quite a lot of people in the fandom that’s nevertheless hard to swallow–at least for me.  

As mentioned before, you might not like what I like, you might approve, or you might be curious enough to check out why I like some stories and find confirmation I’m a fucking kook. I’m willing to discuss but try not to be defensive. You want to be heard, I’ll listen. But when I do, do me the courtesy of hearing me out as well. If you think there are stuff I should check out, either comment on this post or message me. 

If you’re still reading, then maybe you’re curious to find out what I say. Yay! Again, you might be doing so to find further proof what a crazy ass I am. That’s okay too! But since you’re here, let me tell what I look for in the stories that will be in FridayFabFic:

1. COMPLETE. Thus, no WIPs.

2. MULTI-CHAPTERS. I’d like to include one-shots but that would mean considering a type of story under this category that I really don’t like. No, I’m not sorry. Guys, we’re not fascists. We’re allowed to have different opinions. You don’t like angst, you don’t like major character death, well I don’t like…FUCK. I’m shutting up now. People take things so personally, Jesus. Let me pour you some Valpolicella.

3. NO CATEGORIES. Meaning it can be canon-continuation, canon-divergent, crack, modern AU, and universes upon universes. I’ve read a lot of JB. More than I’d like to admit. I lurked around AO3 for a long time before writing fanfic. I would read practically anything. What matters is…

4. THEY’RE WRITTEN BEAUTIFULLY. Such as, despite the reader knowing what universe the fanfic is written in, the writing is not predictable. The depiction of Jaime and Brienne, even if OOC at times, still works in the universe of the story. The story is compelling, a page-turner, a nail-biter, swoony. It can be a lot of things but what I look for is characterization that has depth and whose journey takes me for a ride.

5. AND…THEY PUSH THE ENVELOPE. The joy behind reading fanfic is favorite characters are placed in different situations by the writers. I’m a sucker for anything where Jaime and Brienne go through an emotional, even physical beatdown. I like them when they start out broken, or halfway through the story a monkey wrench whams without warning onto them and things are just never the same. One of them may be die. Or both. As long as the writing prepares the reader, the events are justified and works in the world of the story, PLUS it’s done well, THAT’S the kind of writing I look for. So, don’t count on fluffy stories here. They’re just not my thing, ‘kay? Here. You could use another glass…hey, don’t throw that at me! That’s perfectly good wine!

And so, awesome people, let’s raise our glasses as I unveil the first FridayFabFic… 

Everyone Has Secrets by Ellaria

Summary: (from the author–always acknowledge, guys!)  Political journalist Jaime Lannister finds himself out of alternatives when Millennium, his magazine, becomes endangered by his reckless actions. Brienne Tarth, a professional hacker charged with the task of investigating him, will stumble upon more than she expected. The mystery of a disappearance ten years earlier will draw them to Winterfell, where more than one secret might be uncovered.Based on The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson.

Stuff I probably shouldn’t say but will anyway:

EHS is fucking better than the original. 

Why: 

I read this fanfic first before cracking open Stieg Larsson’s novel. I like EHS better because, and no offense to those who love The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, this fanfic delves deeper into the characters. Every sentence from Ellaria is a beating heart. I am lucky to have read this when it was already complete, and can only imagine the hell readers must have gone through waiting for updates. It’s not just a fantastic edge-of-your-seat thriller but the developing romance between Jaime and Brienne has the slow unraveling, if one can say, found in a Jane Austen novel, but also with a jagged, breath-taking sexiness. You read Everyone Has Secrets either with a cup of your favorite tea or a glass of pinot noir. 

Squee Moment/s: (I had to pick my two absolute favorites)

“Sighs turned into panting, blood mixed with sweat and water. She noticed his bleeding increased due to the motion, but it was not in her to stop anymore. He shifted his angle and shoved himself deeper inside, grazing a place that she had never known was there. With a whimper on her lips she was dragged into total whiteness, an absence of existence, a moment where their juncture was all there was. Letting go of the last of her control, she felt her walls grasp him tightly and dug her nails into his back, trying to keep herself grounded.”

                                     *********************************** “I agree now,” Jaime said, looking straight into her eyes, all traces of his amusement gone. “I should have fought for you, even if I had to fight against you. I should have brought you back, screaming and kicking, back with me, where you belong.”

Jaime Lurves Brienne:

“It will take you at least two whole days.” Lannister frowned and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. “Not to mention that your ass is going to be flat as a board by the time you get there, and you’ll be walking like a cowboy.”

“My ass?” She shook her head in disbelief. “What do you even care about my ass?”

Brienne Lurves Jaime:

The movement caused the blanket to flap around her, and Lannister’s scent filled her nose. For some reason, it felt intoxicating.

Holy Shit Moment/s:

“Here’s what we’re gonna do,” he told her, placing his large hands on the desk. “You’re gonna get on the table and spread those ugly legs of yours, and I’m gonna fuck you until I’m well and pleased. Then I’ll sign the check for your allowance and pay you like the whore you are.”

                                 ***********************************  

It was fierce and loud, and came from the mouth of a big, wolfish mutt that ran towards him. Its yellow eyes regarded Jaime with rage, he barked again and again, slobber dripping from its open jaw. When the animal made to bite, baring his teeth fiercely, Jaime’s instincts took over—he pulled the stag’s antler out of the direwolf and struck the dog on the shoulder.  

Read it for:

1. The high emotional stakes. Every chapter ends on the right note, and long after it has, there’s still that lingering hum. Or purr. I won’t spoil the ending for you other than saying it ends pretty much on such notes, rather than with a bang. And the denouement is as smooth as scotch.

2. The action sequences. Jaime’s fight with a wolf is my favorite.

3. The HAWT sex that finally happened! From the time Jaime catches Brienne in her underwear outside her apartment, to their sexy online late-night chat (I kind of wanted to bang their heads together and order them to just get it on, damn it), until their very much anticipated first time and all the other times that got even more emotional and sexier. 

4. And the ending. It’s one of the most perfect endings in Modern AU JB fanfics. It’s a perfect ten!  

5. Here’s the link! http://archiveofourown.org/works/1126633/chapters/2271647

Oh, and one more thing, Everyone Has Secrets won Third Place in the 2016 All-Time Favourite Game of Thrones Fanfic at Fanatic Fanfics. It’s clearly a winner!

Sorry again that I was a little late. Migraine is an evil bitch fucker finally banished by the magic of a Thai oil whose name I can’t pronounce. I’ll be on time next Friday!

Thanks for reading!

[there-willbeblood]

Chapter 7: Shades of Blue

NATALIA'S POV

I Google searched again and again.

Never in my life had I seen such a  gorgeous shade of blue but I just had to find it. I barely knew his name but as soon as I got home from Plasma last night, my mind wouldn't shut down. I felt like some drug crazed, groupie.

When Wanda pulled me out of the office at Plasma, she was furious and still flailing her rather large taser around for everyone to see that she was tough shit. I was still slightly buzzed from the blood loss mixed with alcohol but nothing compared to the high I got from seeing those eyes for the first time. What the hell was wrong with me?

I looked at him once and already, I was itching to run my hands through his golden hair or run my finger along his chiseled chest that was on full display for me last night. I wasn't an overly sexual person but I was a woman who just saw her first piece of true eye candy and Jesus have mercy, he was fine as hell.

Wanda was less than amused and wouldn't answer my questions as to who my new Mystery Crush was. She was still pissed from having to bring out the big guns so didn't really notice my complete glazed over look as we sat in the back of the cab. She just kept talking and I just kept fantasizing.

It was completely embarrassing but I couldn't help it.

I was so wrapped up in Mystery Crush that I didn't even really feel the throbbing from the back of my leg that was so neatly bandaged, I thought someone had called a doctor. It was entirely ridiculous that I could have this physical attraction to some guy I barely saw for two seconds and then was rushed out of the door but I didn't feel like it had to be explained. If only I could see him one more time, I would be good for the rest of my life.

Does that even make sense?

Last night, I went to bed with dreams of blue going through my head.

Sky. Cobalt. Electric. Sapphire. Navy. Sea. Royal. Indigo. Baby. Midnight. Ice. Wikipedia said that there were an estimated 9,142,857 different shades of blue. I had probably gone through half of them by eight the next morning.

His name was Steve. Such an old-fashioned, strong name but it matched him perfectly. He just stood regally and it only took one second for me to fall for his looks. I bet that's how it always was.

I looked at the clock that now read ten a.m. I hadn't slept since five and I was starting to feel the effects but I wasn't going to rest until I found the right color of his eyes. They were still pulling me in every time I closed mine and thought about the three seconds I saw him standing near the door.

Last night, Steve was high, that was for sure but he still had the sexiest face I had ever seen. It wasn't just that he had a nice face, it was more than that. There was a fire behind him that I could sense and it turned me on immensely although that wasn't anything close to the way he looked at me. Even though he was slightly inebriated, something about him was calling me. It was like I was drawn to him through his blood and that was fucking weird. I was even scaring myself.

"Pull yourself together, Nat." I rubbed my eyes to try and break Steve's spell on me.

I was a fucking junkie with my coffee next to me on the desk and my laptop powered up.

Since I couldn't sleep, I spent my time on the internet trying to find out who Mystery Crush was like a stalker but I wasn't ashamed.

Through a very circuitous route, I found that James "Bucky" Rogers was the owner of Plasma, thus I figured that Steve's last name was the same.

"Come on." I tapped my foot impatiently as Google took its sweet time loading the page after I typed in 'Steve Rogers'. I didn't know anything else so I hoped that was enough to get me some sort of information.

My cell phone brought me out of my lusting and I nearly jumped five feet in the air. I looked around like a cartoon character, with my head shifting from side to side as I searched furiously for my phone that was buried under my un-slept in sheets. I found it near my pillow and picked up just as the ringing stopped. I always left my phone on the charger and never took it anywhere with me. I didn't even know why Nick bought me the thing.

"Hello?" I answer quickly.

"Geez Nat, you sound like you ran a marathon. What's going on?" Wanda asked.

"Nothing." I lied and took several breaths to calm myself, "What's up?"

"I'm bored. Let's do something."

"I can't right now Wanda, and it's ten in the morning. There isn't much to do on a Sunday."

"We should go somewhere outside. It's so pretty and we're not going to have much time once school starts tomorrow."

"Uh...I can't. I have things to do." I stalled.

"Liar. What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Well I'm coming over in an hour. Be ready to go to the lake."

"What lake?"

"Lake Michigan, silly. It's really close and it's going to be filled with hot guys."

"I don't want any hot guys." I instinctively looked at the computer screen but couldn't really make out anything.

"Well I want some. Be ready in two hours." She hung up before I had the chance to say anything else but to be honest, I wasn't listening to her.

I threw the phone back down on my bed and practically raced to the computer.

There were several articles on men named Joseph Rogers who was either that big man in the room with us at Plasma or another brother. Maybe the father? There were a couple of postings on a woman named Sarah who owned a successful design firm and of course James had promotional stuff up for his restaurants and clubs.

I scrolled down the page and tapped my foot faster. My bottom lip was nearly bleeding from the amount of pressure I was putting on it with my teeth.

Of course my eyes zoomed in on the title that read 'Chicago's Sexiest Bachelors'.

I clicked on the link and waited for the page to load while I chewed on my finger. There were thumbnail photos of about thirty men, all of whom were sexy in their own way but I wasn't looking at them. He was number four, how he wasn't number one was beyond me and I was seriously debating writing a petition to have him moved up.

I clicked on the image and my panties were flooded with a sudden rush of my physical lust.

"Sweet baby Jesus." I breathed as I looked at my computer screen.

Steve was in the most form fitting, tailored, navy blue suit I had ever seen as it clung to the strong lines of his body. He was standing tall with his arms crossed, against a window that overlooked the city in the background. His hair was more styled than it had been last night but his face and eyes were still the same. I would call him beautiful but that didn't seem to be the right word for a man like him. I would have to do another Google search to find the perfect adjective. Maybe exquisite, superb, godly?

He was almost too stunning to look at and my eyes kind of hurt but I couldn't not stare at him. What I wouldn't give to have him on my bed, tied up and naked.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" I played with the ends of my hair as I read the short biography.

Steve Rogers

Age: 25

Steve Rogers comes from the Rogers business dynasty and has grown up in the upper echelon of Chicago society. His father Joseph and mother Sarah have raised three boys but Steve seems to be the only one making serious rounds in the dating community. As a fresh, up-and-coming real estate mogul, the youngest Rogers brother has already been dubbed a revamped James Dean type with piercing blue eyes that can mesmerize.

"A guy likes confidence in a girl. I love a confident girl who will come up and talk to me," Rogers told us.  While Rogers isn't planning on settling down in the near future, that hasn't stopped him from "testing the waters" as he put it.

I didn't even notice that my hand was down my pants until it was almost too late. My index finger ran over my swollen clit and my butt lifted off of the chair, pushing my finger into my soaked entrance. I curled my finger slightly and kept up a constant rhythm as I looked at Steve's picture, his eyes boring into mine, causing my body to react immediately.

It only took two minutes before I was crashing down from the quickest yet most intense orgasm I had ever had. It took me significantly longer to bring myself back to reality as I rested my head on the back of the chair.

I stayed in that position for about half an hour, not moving, not blinking, barely breathing.

I pulled my hand back up when I could think again. I closed my laptop, not even caring to power it down. I stood up and paced the floor with heavy breathing.

Never in my life had I been so attracted to a man. Not even in my short hormonal period that I went through when I turned fifteen. Back then, everything with a penis had the ability to turn my head. Of course I wasn't a slut and didn't do anything with them until Clint came along but that still didn't stop me from having a few late night, hand parties under my sheets. Actually, Clint was the only person I had ever had sex with but that doesn't mean I didn't think about it.

This Steve fellow had the ability to turn me into a puddle just over the computer and that was dangerous.

There was a knock on my door that almost made me fall over. I calmed myself down and made sure that I looked somewhat pulled together, still in my pajama pants and a tank top.

I went to the door to let Wanda in.

"Are you ready?" She held up her hands to show off her hot pink cover up that was hiding what I suspected to be a skimpy bikini underneath.

"Oh...has it been an hour already?" I looked at the clock.

Her face fell. "What is wrong with you? Why do you look so flushed?" She lowered her sunglasses, "Is there a man in that bathroom?"

"No. It's just a little hot in here." I fanned myself.

"Well that's why we're going to the beach. I brought you a bathing suit."

"Oh God. Please have it cover me up." I prayed.

"Yes, I picked out something modest." She pushed her sunglasses up into her hair, "Now move! I want to leave soon."

"I can't go to the beach Wanda." I complained, pointing to the still covered up cut on my leg, "Sand and open wounds don't mix."

"Oh yeah." She pouted, "Sorry about that by the way."

"It wasn't your fault."

"I should have been watching you."

"We can do something else? Show me more of Chicago." I suggested, brightening her up.

"Okay." She jumped up and down, "Go get dressed."

I went into the bathroom to do my normal routine that only took a couple of minutes.

I walked out and went straight to my dresser. I pulled on a pair of short jean shorts that would provide me some kind of coverage but were still breathable in the Chicago heat and a tee shirt.

"Who's this?" Wanda pointed to the computer that I had shut but now stood open.

I quickly closed it before more questions began pouring from her mouth.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"No. I want to know who that was. I just saw the picture. I think I've seen him before." She tried to push my hand away but I wasn't budging.

"He's no one. Leave it alone." I snarled.

"Fine." She crossed her arms, "Make sure you bring money for the cab. I didn't bring my wallet."

I looked around the room and my face screwed up.

Where was my purse from last night?

I sent out the search party.

Wanda and I looked for the thing for an hour before we concluded that my purse wasn't there. I know I had it with me last night but who knows what really happened after I passed out. I could have left it on the couches or someone could have stolen it but I didn't think so. I remember having it with me in Edw…in his office. I think I saw it on the desk but I wasn't sure.

"It's not here Nat. What did you do with that purse?" Wanda said from under my bed.

"I don't know. I could have sworn that I had it with me last night."

"You did because I reminded myself when we walked into Plasma that I wanted to borrow the thing. It goes perfect with a blouse I just bought."

"Well you bought the stupid thing. I barely know what it looks like."

"It's a white clutch." She grumbled, going further under the bed.

"I bet I left it at the club when I feel or something." I sat in the chair by the desk, "Damn."

"What did you have in it?" Wanda crawled out from her spot and sat on the bed.

"Some money, not a lot but some and my , those were important."

"But you had your key last night, didn't you?"

"No, you let me in, remember?"

"Oh yeah." She thought for a second, "I guess we could call Plasma and see if what's-his-name picked it up."

My heart started to beat quickly at the thought of going back into that place. Maybe it was from excitement or nervousness but the scene of the crime was never a good place to be.

"Do…do you think James would still have it?" I asked skeptically, trying to cover up my new found enthusiasm. Just the thought of being in the same vicinity as Steve was about to make me combust.

She shrugged, "I don't see why not. We can find the number online."

Before I even had the chance to open up my laptop, the phone on my bed rang. Wanda and I both turned to look at it. Since she was closer, she picked it up like it was hers.

"Hello….oh…yeah….okay…she's right here…." She covered the phone with her hand, "It's an Steve. Do you know a Steve?"

Sudden flashes of green ran through my head like blades of grass being thrown from a lawn mower.

He was calling me?

"Uh…yeah. It was the guy near the door last night in the office." I said and calmly held my hand out for the phone.

"I didn't really see anyone."

"I wouldn't be surprised. You were going all Rambo on their asses to notice. Give me the phone."

She handed it over and I placed it to my ear, "Hello."

"Is this Natalia, from last night?" A cool voice came from the other line and I almost died right there. If Wanda wasn't here, I would have had my second "happy time" of the day.

"Yes, this is she." I replied formally. I don't know why.

"I don't even know if you'll remember me…"

"Of course I do. You bandaged my leg." I spoke a little too loudly and blushed over the phone. Damn it, damn it all to hell!

I heard him darkly chuckled over the phone, "I have your purse. You must have left it here. You had a list of numbers in your wallet and I just called the one that said it was your cell phone."

"Oh…well thank you."

"It's no problem. Would you like to come and get it or would you like me to bring it to you?"

There was a slight tinge in his voice that told me he had a narcissistic view of himself. It was almost as if he could bounce his voice in a way that would make him seem superior. I hoped he was just putting up a front over the phone because it would be a shame if he had all that beauty but a messed up personality.

"Um…well my friend Wanda and I were just about to go out. I guess we could meet you somewhere." I answered.

Wanda wrote something on a piece of paper eagerly and held it up for me to read.

"Sure." He replied.

"I can meet you in Grant Park, at the Buckingham fountain in what…an hour?"

Wanda nodded vigorously.

"That's fine with me. I'll see you then Natalia." He hung up the phone without any kind of goodbye and I was left with a low ringing dial tone.

"Well that was sufficiently awkward." I put the phone down.

"You like him." Wanda had a wicked grin on her face. "I can tell. That was the guy on the computer wasn't it? I remember now."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Liar." She accused. "Don't you try to hide from me Natalia Romanov."

"I don't know what you mean." I was lying through my teeth but I was still hoping that she didn't notice.

"You are in so much denial. You blushed and you had that thing in your voice." She dragged me up.

"Thing?"

"Yeah. I can tell you had dreams about him. You masturbated to him didn't you? I know you did." She jumped off of the bed and did some kind of weird dance.

"I did not. Stop that." I pushed her back down so that she would sit still.

"You are just a hormonal little minx, aren't you? Who knew that Natalia Romanov would relieve herself to the likes of that guy. He was so…" She shuddered instead of speaking, "Although I have to admit that he had a nice body. I just got one glimpse but that was enough."

"Shut up." I grumbled.

She got off of the bed and began pulling me with her.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"To meet your new lover. I want to see him close up and without my taser."

"Oh great. Scare him again." I stuffed my feet in my shoes.

"In my defense, I thought they were raping you. I was trying to help."

"You almost killed them."

"It wouldn't be the first time." She said nonchalantly, "Come on." She pulled me out of the door and my heart started beating faster by the second.

Wanda explained to me that we could get to Grant Park by walking and since it was a nice day, I didn't really have a problem stretching my legs. I was working on less than two hours of sleep and three cups of coffee so I was pretty energetic.

We had an hour to kill so we walked at a leisurely pace while talking about school and life. I was just trying to get her off the subject of Steve, which she didn't bring up again but I could tell that she wanted to. We arrived at the entrance of Grant Park from Columbus Avenue forty-five minutes later.

"So….who is your mystery man?" Wanda nudged me. I could see the spray from the fountain up ahead but I tried not to look too eager.

"I don't know. I only met him for a couple of seconds before you pushed me out of the door."

"Well we had to get out of there. It was weird." She shivered. "Something was going on in that room that I didn't like. The vibes were strange."

"The vibes, what are you now, physic?"

"Duh. I've been trying to convince people of that for years but no one believes me. Call it whatever you want but I've got the gift." She pushed her fingers to her temple.

"You are one strange woman." I said under my breath.

"Whatever. Do you need some moral support? I think he's just using your purse to get to you. What if he likes you too? What if he's like this…super sexy superhero with amazing powers or…"

"Okay, okay. I get it." I calmed her down. "I just hope he didn't go through my stuff."

"He probably just wanted to meet you again."

"Stop being stupid." I said. There was no way in hell Steve Rogers, Chicago's fourth sexiest bachelor, would want to meet me. He probably had tons more things to do than bring me my purse.

"Okay, well I'll be here if you need me." Wanda sat herself on a bench under some shaded trees and I kept walking towards Buckingham Fountain.

The whole place was huge and I had never seen so much water that wasn't in an ocean before. It was one of those Chicago landmarks that was on all of the postcards and had streams of water shooting into the sky. Majestic, bronzed, green horses were climbing out of the fountain and it looked like everything was actually moving. Stone and marble basins stood strongly as they peeked over the water top.

The surrounding area was filled with kids and families who were throwing pennies into the fountain. Large trees were covering the location with grassed places for sitting. Lots of old benches were around for people to sit and I noticed that people were eating lunch in the sun. It was very peaceful.

I just stood there and watched, trying to get my mind off of my masturbatory dream.

"It's a beautiful sight at night." A smooth voice whispered to me.

I jumped and spun around where Steve was holding out my clutch with a crooked grin on his face.

"You scared the crap out of me." I spoke softly, running my hands through my hair, smoothing it out.

"Sorry. I just couldn't help it. I was calling your name for about a minute." He chuckled marvelously.

"Oh…I guess I didn't hear you." I replied awkwardly.

"That's obvious. I brought your purse back and I promise I didn't steal anything."

"How do I know you're not lying?"

"I guess you'll just have to trust me."

"Did you go through my things?" I took the purse from him, acting a little callous towards him but I didn't want to appear like a giddy school girl.

"No, I didn't have to after I found the cell phone list. I didn't want to impede on your privacy."

He crossed his arms behind him and I was glad that he had a pair of Ray Bans on or I might have been thrown to the floor by eyes.

I was worried that he would look at my driver's license and realize that I wasn't really twenty-one but he seemed to be telling the truth about not going through my things.

"Thank you." I said.

"No problem." His grin seemed to be permanent. Something about him was different today than it was last night and I couldn't put my finger on it. He just seemed to have this attitude about him that was very arrogant. He eyed me up and down in a creepy way and even though he was still sexy as hell, I was starting to wise up to his antics.

"Well thank you…for this and for last night." I pointed to the back of my leg.

"It wasn't a problem. It's not every day I get to wipe down a leg as beautiful as yours."

"Uh huh." I replied.

He was dressed in a very smart pair of black slacks and a light blue collar shirt that had its sleeves rolled up, looking old and young at the same time.

"You look very nice today." I said, trying to keep talking and not fantasize about the perfect chest that was underneath.

"I just came from church." He explained.

"That would explain it." I nodded, slipping further into awkwardness.

"Yeah." He shuffled his feet, "So, what do you have planned today?"

"It's the last day before school starts so Wanda and I are going to walk around a bit."

"You're in school?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah." I blushed for some reason.

"Junior?"

"Yes." I said before I could stop myself. Just like last night when I told James I was twenty-one.

"Do you need a tutor? Maybe I could help you out sometime." Steve's voice filled with innuendo and that just made him even slimier in my eyes.

"Is that a pick up line?" I asked, not even hiding my discomfort or disgust with the situation.

"What would you do if I said yes?" He ran his hands through his hair, trying to smooth it out.

That was when I noticed that all of this was too calculated. Every movement he made seemed like it had been practiced and done over hundreds of times. He was trying to pick me up just like he did every other girl he met. It was flattering while also being extremely overconfident on his part. It was sickening to think that this was all he had to do before girls rolled over for him although I had to admit that he had done less with me last night and I was already infatuated.

"I would say that I'm not some chick who you can get to suck your dick by being a jackass." My bold side was starting to come out.

"I have been nothing but nice to you." His lips twitched into a small smirk. He obviously liked my reaction a little too much.

"You've been a little too nice."

"Isn't that what girls want?"

"What do you think I am?"

"I'm not sure. I just met you last night."

"Damn straight." I was breathing kind of heavily and was surprised that I hadn't slapped him by now. Maybe I was getting ahead of myself.

He kept up his smirk with his hands crossed behind his back, "Are you finished with your pathetic excuse for an early 19th century woman's suffrage speech?"

I was kind of taken aback by his boldness but then realized that people usually bowed to him. He was rich, fine as hell, obviously smarter than most scholars and had a hint of danger about him. What wasn't to love?

"You're impossible." I started to walk away but he gingerly took my wrist and turned me back around. I snatched away from his grasp.

"Am I annoying you?" He asked and was almost laughing.

"Immensely."

"Are you irritated?" He started to circle me like I was his fucking prey.

"Massively." I growled.

"Am I making you…angry?" He whispered in a delicious way close to my face.

I didn't even bother answering. My face held all the anger I was feeling.

"They say that anger is the sign of true passion. We could create magic together, Natalia."

"Are you that arrogant that you think I would…what, fuck you? I don't even know you."

"Perfect. Literally no strings attached. Okay, let me just get this out there. I think you're incredibly sexy and if you would let me, I would like to have a nice fuck before I go about my business." He stopped playing his games.

My mouth hung open as I digested his words. I did register somewhere that he had called me sexy but that was overshadowed by the fact that he thought he was going to get a quick fuck from me.

"Are you serious? Is that how you normally get girls?" I asked, stunned.

"Actually, no. Ideally, you would already be on your back by now." He got a little angrier, "You're very frustrating."

It was in that moment that Steve Rogers went from total heartthrob to every other ubiquitous jerk I met in high school.

"Thanks for bringing me back my purse." I didn't even chance a look back at him as I walked around the fountain.

I could feel his eyes on me and hoped that he got a good look of my ass because that was the last time he was ever going to see it.

[anavoliselenu]

blood chapter 4

I Google searched again and again.

Never in my life had I seen such an off shade of green but I just had to find it. I barely knew his name but as soon as I got home from Plasma last night, my mind wouldn't shut down. I felt like some drug crazed, groupie.

When Alice pulled me out of the office at Plasma, she was furious and still flailing her rather large taser around for everyone to see that she was tough shit. I was still slightly buzzed from the blood loss mixed with alcohol but nothing compared to the high I got from seeing those eyes for the first time. What the hell was wrong with me? Get it together Selena!

I looked at him once and already, I was itching to run my hands through his bronze hair or run my finger along his chiseled chest that was on full display for me last night. I wasn't an overly sexual person but I was a woman who just saw her first piece of true eye candy and Jesus have mercy, he was fine as hell.

Alice was less than amused and wouldn't answer my questions as to who my new Mystery Crush was. She was still pissed from having to bring out the big guns so didn't really notice my complete glazed over look as we sat in the back of the cab. She just kept talking and I just kept fantasizing.

It was completely embarrassing but I couldn't help it.

I was so wrapped up in Mystery Crush that I didn't even really feel the throbbing from the back of my leg that was so neatly bandaged, I thought someone had called a doctor. It was entirely ridiculous that I could have this physical attraction to some guy I barely saw for two seconds and then was rushed out of the door but I didn't feel like it had to be explained. If only I could see him one more time, I would be good for the rest of my life.

Does that even make sense?

Last night, I went to bed with dreams of green going through my head.

Emerald. Candy apple. Electric. Army. Fern. Sea. Shamrock. Jade. Pigment. Pine. Viridian. Wikipedia said that there were an estimated 9,142,857 different shades of green. I had probably gone through half of them by eight the next morning.

His name was Justin. Such an old-fashioned, strong name but it matched him perfectly. He just stood regally and it only took one second for me to fall for his looks. I bet that's how it always was.

I looked at the clock that now read ten a.m. I hadn't slept since five and I was starting to feel the effects but I wasn't going to rest until I found the right color of his eyes. They were still pulling me in every time I closed mine and thought about the three seconds I saw him standing near the door.

Last night, Justin was high, that was for sure but he still had the sexiest face I had ever seen. It wasn't just that he had a nice face, it was more than that. There was a fire behind him that I could sense and it turned me on immensely although that wasn't anything close to the way he looked at me. Even thought he was slightly inebriated, something about him was calling me. It was like I was drawn to him through his blood and that was fucking weird. I was even scaring myself.

"Pull yourself together, Selena." I rubbed my eyes to try and break Justin's spell on me.

I was a fucking junkie with my coffee next to me on the desk and my laptop powered up.

Since I couldn't sleep, I spent my time on the internet trying to find out who Mystery Crush was like a stalker but I wasn't ashamed.

Through a very circuitous route, I found that Jasper Bieber was the owner of Plasma, thus I figured that Justin's last name was the same.

"Come on." I tapped my foot impatiently as Google took its sweet time loading the page after I typed in 'Justin Bieber'. I didn't know anything else so I hoped that was enough to get me some sort of information.

My cell phone brought me out of my lusting and I nearly jumped five feet in the air. I looked around like a cartoon character, with my head shifting from side to side as I searched furiously for my phone that was buried under my un-slept in sheets. I found it near my pillow and picked up just as the ringing stopped. I always left my phone on the charger and never took it anywhere with me. I didn't even know why Charlie bought me the thing.

"Hello?" I answer quickly.

"Gezz Selena, you sound like you ran a marathon. What's going on?" Alice asked.

"Nothing." I lied and took several breaths to calm myself, "What's up?"

"I'm bored. Let's do something."

"I can't right now Alice and it's ten in the morning. There isn't much to do on a Sunday."

"We should go somewhere outside. It's so pretty and we're not going to have much time once school starts tomorrow."

"Uh...I can't. I have things to do." I stalled.

"Liar. What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Well I'm coming over in an hour. Be ready to go to the lake."

"What lake?"

"Lake Michigan, silly. It's really close and it's going to be filled with hot guys."

"I don't want any hot guys." I instinctively looked at the computer screen but couldn't really make out anything.

"Well I want some. Be ready in two hours." She hung up before I had the chance to say anything else but to be honest, I wasn't listening to her.

I threw the phone back down on my bed and practically raced to the computer.

There were several articles on men named Carlilse Bieber who was either that big man in the room with us at Plasma or another brother. Maybe the father? There were a couple of postings on a woman named Esme who owned a successful design firm and of course Jasper had promotional stuff up for his restaurants and clubs.

I scrowled down the page and tapped my foot faster. My bottom lip was nearly bleeding from the amount of pressure I was putting on it with my teeth.

Of course my eyes zoomed in on the title that read 'Chicago's Sexiest Bachelors'.

I clicked on the link and waited for the page to load while I chewed on my finger. There were thumbnail photos of about thirty men, all of whom were sexy in their own way but I wasn't looking at them. He was number four, how he wasn't number one was beyond me and I was seriously debating writing a petition to have him moved up.

I clicked on the image and my panties were flooded with a sudden rush of my physical lust.

"Sweet baby Jesus." I breathed as I looked at my computer screen.

Justin was in the most form fitting, tailored, navy blue suit I had ever seen as it clung to the strong lines of his body. He was standing tall with his arms crossed, against a window that overlooked the city in the background. His hair was more styled than it had been last night but his face and eyes were still the same. I would call him beautiful but that didn't seem to be the right word for a man like him. I would have to do another Google search to find the perfect adjective. Maybe exquisite, superb, godly?

He was almost too stunning to look at and my eyes kind of hurt but I couldn't not stare at him. What I wouldn't give to have him on my bed, tied up and naked.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" I played with the ends of my hair as I read the short biography.

Justin Bieber

Age: 25

Justin Bieber comes from the Bieber business dynasty and has grown up in the upper echelon of Chicago society. His father Carlisle and mother Esme have raised three boys but Justin seems to be the only one making serious rounds in the dating community. As a fresh, up-and-coming real estate mogul, the youngest Bieber brother has already been dubbed a revamped James Dean type with piercing green eyes that can mesmerize.

"A guy likes confidence in a girl. I love a confident girl who will come up and talk to me," Bieber told us.

While Bieber isn't planning on settling down in the near future, that hasn't stopped him from "testing the waters" as he put it.

I didn't even notice that my hand was down my pants until it was almost too late. My index finger ran over my swollen clit and my butt lifted off of the chair, pushing my digit into my soaked entrance. I curled my finger slightly and kept up a constant rhythm as I looked at Justin's picture, his eyes boring into mine, causing my body to react immediately.

It only took two minutes before I was crashing down from the quickest yet most intense orgasm I had ever had. It took me significantly longer to bring myself back to reality as I rested my head on the back of the chair.

I stayed in that position for about half an hour, not moving, not blinking, barely breathing.

I pulled my hand back up when I could think again. I closed my laptop, not even caring to power it down. I stood up and paced the floor with heavy breathing.

Never in my life had I been so attracted to a man. Not even in my short hormonal period that I went through when I turned fifteen. Back then, everything with a penis had the ability to turn my head. Of course I wasn't a slut and didn't do anything with them until Mike came along but that still didn't stop me from having a few late night, hand parties under my sheets. Actually, Mike was the only person I had ever had sex with but that doesn't mean I didn't think about it.

This Justin fellow had the ability to turn me into a puddle just over the computer and that was dangerous.

There was a knock on my door that almost made me fall over. I calmed myself down and made sure that I looked somewhat pulled together, still in my pajama pants and a tank top.

I went to the door to let Alice in.

"Are you ready?" She held up her hands to show off her hot pink cover up that was hiding what I suspected to be a skimpy bikini underneath.

"Oh...has it been an hour already?" I looked at the clock.

Her face fell, "What is wrong with you? Why do you look so flushed?" She lowered her sunglasses, "Is there a man in that bathroom?"

"No. It's just a little hot in here." I fanned myself.

"Well that's why we're going to the beach. I brought you a bathing suit."

"Oh God. Please have it cover me up." I prayed.

"Yes, I picked out something modest." She pushed her sunglasses up into her hair, "Now move! I want to leave soon."

"I can't go to the beach Alice." I complained, pointing to the still covered up cut on my leg, "Sand and open wounds don't mix."

"Oh yeah." She pouted, "Sorry about that by the way."

"It wasn't your fault."

"I should have been watching you."

"We can do something else? Show me more of Chicago." I suggested, brightening her up.

"Okay." She jumped up and down, "Go get dressed."

I went into the bathroom to do my normal routine that only took a couple of minutes.

I walked out and went straight to my dresser. I pulled on a pair of short jean shorts that would provide me some kind of coverage but were still breathable in the Chicago heat and a tee shirt.

"Who's this?" Alice pointed to the computer that I had shut but now stood open.

I quickly closed it before more questions began pouring from her mouth.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"No. I want to know who that was. I just saw the picture. I think I've seen him before." She tried to push my hand away but I wasn't budging.

"He's no one. Leave it alone." I snarled.

"Fine." She crossed her arms, "Make sure you bring money for the cab. I didn't bring my wallet."

I looked around the room and my face screwed up.

Where was my purse from last night?

I sent out the search party.

Alice and I looked for the thing for an hour before we concluded that my purse wasn't there. I know I had it with me last night but who knows what really happened after I passed out. I could have left it on the couches or someone could have stolen it but I didn't think so. I remember having it with me in Edw…in his office. I think I saw it on the desk but I wasn't sure.

"It's not here Selena. What did you do with that purse?" Alice said from under my bed.

"I don't know. I could have sworn that I had it with me last night."

"You did because I reminded myself when we walked into Plasma that I wanted to borrow the thing. It goes perfect with a blouse I just bought."

"Well you bought the stupid thing. I barely know what it looks like."

"It's a white clutch." She grumbled, going further under the bed.

"I bet I left it at the club when I feel or something." I sat in the chair by the desk, "Damn."

"What did you have in it?" Alice crawled out from her spot and sat on the bed.

"Some money, not a lot but some and my , those were important."

"But you had your key last night, didn't you?"

"No, you let me in, remember?"

"Oh yeah." She thought for a second, "I guess we could call Plasma and see if whats-his-name picked it up."

My heart started to beat quickly at the thought of going back into that place. Maybe it was from excitement or nervousness but the scene of the crime was never a good place to be.

"Do…do you think Jasper would still have it?" I asked skeptically, trying to cover up my new found enthusiasm. Just the thought of being in the same vicinity as Justin was about to make me combust.

She shrugged, "I don't see why not. We can find the number online."

Before I even had the chance to open up my laptop, the phone on my bed rang. Alice and I both turned to look at it. Since she was closer, she picked it up like it was hers.

"Hello….oh…yeah….okay…she's right here…." She covered the phone with her hand, "It's an Justin. Do you know an Justin?"

Sudden flashes of green ran through my head like blades of grass being thrown from a lawn mower.

He was calling me?

"Uh…yeah. It was the guy near the door last night in the office." I said and calmly held my hand out for the phone.

"I didn't really see anyone."

"I wouldn't be surprised. You were going all Rambo on their asses to notice. Give me the phone."

She handed it over and I placed it to my ear, "Hello."

"Is this Selena, from last night?" A cool voice came from the other line and I almost died right there. If Alice wasn't here, I would have had my second "happy time" of the day.

"Yes, this is she." I replied formally. I don't know why.

"I don't even know if you'll remember me…"

"Of course I do. You bandaged my leg." I spoke a little too loudly and blushed over the phone. Damn it, damn it all to hell!

I heard him darkly chuckled over the phone, "I have your purse. You must have left it here. You had a list of numbers in your wallet and I just called the one that said it was your cell phone."

"Oh…well thank you."

"It's no problem. Would you like to come and get it or would you like me to bring it to you?" There was a slight tinge in his voice that told me he had a narcissistic view of himself. It was almost as if he could bounce his voice in a way that would make him seem superior. I hoped he was just putting up a front over the phone because it would be a shame if he had all that beauty but a messed up personality.

"Um…well my friend Alice and I were just about to go out. I guess we could meet you somewhere." I answered.

Alice wrote something on a piece of paper eagerly and held it up for me to read.

"Sure." He replied.

"I can meet you in Grant Park, at the Buckingham fountain in what…an hour?"

Alice nodded vigorously.

"That's fine with me. I'll see you then Selena." He hung up the phone without any kind of goodbye and I was left with a low ringing dial tone.

"Well that was sufficiently awkward." I put the phone down.

"You like him." Alice had a wicked grin on her face, "I can tell. That was the guy on the computer wasn't it? I remember now."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Liar." She accused, "Don't you try to hide from me Selena Swan."

"I don't know what you mean." I was lying through my teeth but I was still hoping that she didn't notice.

"You are in so much denial. You blushed and you had that thing in your voice." She dragged me up.

"Thing?"

"Yeah. I can tell you had dreams about him. You masturbated to him didn't you? I know you did." She jumped off of the bed and did some kind of weird dance.

"I did not. Stop that." I pushed her back down so that she would sit still.

"You are just a hormonal little minx, aren't you? Who knew that Selena Swan would relieve herself to the likes of that guy. He was so…" She shuddered instead of speaking, "Although I have to admit that he had a nice body. I just got one glimpse but that was enough."

"Shut up." I grumbled.

She got off of the bed and began pulling me with her.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"To meet your new lover. I want to see him close up and without my taser."

"Oh great. Scare him again." I stuffed me feet in my shoes.

"In my defense, I thought they were raping you. I was trying to help."

"You almost killed them."

"It wouldn't be the first time." She said nonchalantly, "Come on." She pulled me out of the door and my heart started beating faster by the second.

Alice explained to me that we could get to Grant Park by walking and since it was a nice day, I didn't really have a problem stretching my legs. I was working on less than two hours of sleep and three cups of coffee so I was pretty energetic.

We had an hour to kill so we walked at a leisurely pace while talking about school and life. I was just trying to get her off the subject of Justin, which she didn't bring up again but I could tell that she wanted to. We arrived at the entrance of Grant Park from Columbus Avenue forty-five minutes later.

"So….who is your mystery man?" Alice nudged me. I could see the spray from the fountain up ahead but I tried not to look too eager.

"I don't know. I only met him for a couple of seconds before you pushed me out of the door."

"Well we had to get out of there. It was weird." She shivered. "Something was going on in that room that I didn't like. The vibes were strange."

"The vibes, what are you now, physic?"

"Duh. I've been trying to convince people of that for years but no one believes me. Call it whatever you want but I've got the gift." She pushed her fingers to her temple.

"You are one strange woman." I said under my breath.

"Whatever. Do you need some moral support? I think he's just using your purse to get to you. What if he likes you too? What if he's like this…super sexy superhero with amazing powers or…"

"Okay, okay. I get it." I calmed her down. "I just hope he didn't go through my stuff."

"He probably just wanted to meet you again."

"Stop being stupid." I said. There was no way in hell Justin Bieber, Chicago's fourth sexiest bachelor, would want to meet me. He probably had tons more things to do than bring me my purse.

"Okay, well I'll be here if you need me." Alice sat herself on a bench under some shaded tress and I kept walking towards Buckingham Fountain.

The whole place was huge and I had never seen so much water that wasn't in an ocean before. It was one of those Chicago landmarks that was on all of the postcards and had streams of water shooting into the sky. Majestic, bronzed, green horses were climbing out of the fountain and it looked like everything was actually moving. Stone and marble basins stood strongly as they peaked over the water top.

The surrounding area was filled with kids and families who were throwing pennies into the fountain. Large trees were covering the location with grassed places for sitting. Lots of old benches were around for people to sit and I noticed that people were eating lunch in the sun. It was very peaceful.

I just stood there and watched, trying to get my mind off of my masturbatory dream.

"It's a beautiful sight at night." A smooth voice whispered to me.

I jumped and spun around where Justin was holding out my clutch with a crocked grin on his face.

"You scared the crap out of me." I spoke softly, running my hands through my hair, smoothing it out.

"Sorry. I just couldn't help it. I was calling your name for about a minute." He chuckled marvelously.

"Oh…I guess I didn't hear you." I replied awkwardly.

"That's obvious. I brought your purse back and I promise I didn't steal anything."

"How do I know you're not lying?"

"I guess you'll just have to trust me."

"Did you go through my things?" I took the purse from him, acting a little callous towards him but I didn't want to appear like a giddy school girl.

"No, I didn't have to after I found the cell phone list. I didn't want to impede on your privacy."

Impede?This charmer had a vocabulary.

He crossed his arms behind him and I was glad that he had a pair of Ray Bans on or I might have been thrown to the floor by eyes.

I was worried that he would look at my driver's license and realize that I wasn't really twenty-one but he seemed to be telling the truth about not going through my things.

"Thank you." I said.

"No problem." His grin seemed to be permanent. Something about him was different today than it was last night and I couldn't put my finger on it. He just seemed to have this attitude about him that was very arrogant. He eyed me up and down in a creepy way and even though he was still sexy as hell, I was starting to wise up to his antics.

"Well thank you…for this and for last night." I pointed to the back of my leg.

"It wasn't a problem. It's not every day I get to wipe down a leg as beautiful as yours."

"Uh huh." I replied.

He was dressed in a very smart pair of black slacks and a light blue collar shirt that had its sleeves rolled up, looking old and young at the same time.

"You look very nice today." I said, trying to keep talking and not fantasize about the perfect chest that was underneath.

"I just came from church." He explained.

"That would explain it." I nodded, slipping further into awkwardness.

"Yeah." He shuffled his feet, "So, what do you have planned today?"

"It's the last day before school starts so Alice and I are going to walk around a bit."

"You're in school?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah." I blushed for some reason.

"Junior?"

"Yes." I said before I could stop myself. Just like last night when I told Jasper I was twenty-one.

Pull it together, liar!

"Do you need a tutor? Maybe I could help you out sometime." Justin's voice filled with innuendo and that just made him even slimier in my eyes.

"Is that a pick up line?" I asked, not even hiding my discomfort or disgust with the situation.

"What would you do if I said yes?" He ran his hands through his hair, trying to smooth it out.

That was when I noticed that all of this was too calculated. Every movement he made seemed like it had been practiced and done over hundreds of times. He was trying to pick me up just like he did every other girl he met. It was flattering while also being extremely overconfident on his part. It was sickening to think that this was all he had to do before girls rolled over for him although I had to admit that he had done less with me last night and I was already infatuated.

"I would say that I'm not some chick who you can get to suck your dick by being a jackass." My bold side was starting to come out.

"I have been nothing but nice to you." His lips twitched into a small smirk. He obviously liked my reaction a little too much.

"You've been a little too nice."

"Isn't that what girls want?"

"What do you think I am?"

"I'm not sure. I just met you last night."

"Damn straight." I was breathing kind of heavily and was surprised that I hadn't slapped him by now. Maybe I was getting ahead of myself.

He kept up his smirk with his hands crossed behind his back, "Are you finished with your pathetic excuse for an early 19th century woman's suffrage speech?"

I was kind of taken aback by his boldness but then realized that people usually bowed to him. He was rich, fine as hell, obviously smarter than most scholars and had a hint of danger about him. What wasn't to love?

"You're impossible." I started to walk away but he gingerly took my wrist and turned me back around. I snatched away from his grasp.

"Am I annoying you?" He asked and was almost laughing.

"Immensely."

"Are you irritated?" He started to circle me like I was his fucking prey.

"Massively." I growled.

"Am I making you…angry?" He whispered in a delicious way close to my face.

I didn't even bother answering. My face held all the anger I was feeling.

"They say that anger is the sign of true passion. We could create magic together, Selena."

"Are you that arrogant that you think I would…what, fuck you? I don't even know you."

"Perfect. Literally no strings attached."

"Okay, let me just get this out there. I think you're incredibly sexy and if you would let me, I would like to have a nice fuck before I go about my business." He stopped playing his games.

My mouth hung open as I digested his words. I did register somewhere that he had called me sexy but that was overshadowed by the fact that he thought he was going to get a quick fuck from me.

"Are you serious? Is that how you normally get girls?" I asked, stunned.

"Actually, no. Ideally, you would already be on your back by now." He got a little angrier, "You're very frustrating."

It was in that moment that Justin Bieber went from total heartthrob to every other ubiquitous jerk I met in high school.

"Thanks for bringing me back my purse." I didn't even chance a look back at him as I walked around the fountain.

I could feel his eyes on me and hoped that he got a good look of my ass because that was the last time he was ever going to see it.

I tapped my pen in a systematic rhythm on the wood of my desk in my penthouse as I thought about…well, nothing in particular but I felt like I should be doing something productive. The only problem was that I couldn't bring myself to get busy with anything.

It had been like this for the past week, ever since I met Selena at the fountain to return her purse.

What the hell was wrong with her?

My normal tricks didn't work. Usually, it took three minutes, five tops to hook a woman. I had gotten it down to a very mechanical and precise routine but Selena shattered all that to hell. What the heck was her problem?

"I bet she's a lesbian." I nodded, trying to convince myself of that but it wasn't working.

This girl was grating on my last nerves. As a man who likes to play games and make conquests, Selena should have been an easy kill for me, a simple mark but somehow, my charm hadn't worked. I had been going over the events of that Sunday for the past week, trying to figure out where I went wrong but my photographic memory allowed me to see that I played my role to perfection. Therefore, the blame had to be placed on her.

I couldn't sleep that night. Well, I never slept but that night I was increasingly restless all because of that damned Selena. She was like a bug that was trying to borough under my skin and wouldn't leave me alone. She was becoming a serious problem in my eyes.

By Tuesday, she was clouding my judgment, making me forget simple things and I didn't know what the hell was wrong with me. By Thursday, I had literally tried to fuck her out of my system by calling over almost every girl in my little black book but none of them were helping because I had already conquered them. By Friday, I was high on a shipment of cocaine that my father got from Vietnam and yet Selena was still able to break the barriers of my drug induced haze.

It was now Saturday, one of my days off but guess who was sitting at his desk like a bitch, trying to figure some girl out? Me!

I never once in my life had to work this hard for a lay and I had only met the woman twice, both times lasting less than a minute. Selena…

Selena.

Selena.

Selena?

What kind of name was that anyway?

I guess I could go to her but that was against my morals, code, routine, whatever you wanted to call it. I didn't chase women, they chased me. I half expected her to call on Monday but something about her told me that she wouldn't. It was weird. I felt like I knew this girl even though I had barley laid eyes on her. I had called her first, to give her the purse back. That was my gentlemanly hook and she was supposed to bite.

I kind of lost my cool with her for a second when I saw her at the fountain but that was only because she was distracting me. She looked…stunning even in her dressed down attire that I found oddly refreshing. I never wore anything but suits and the occasional workout clothes when I went to the gym but anything else wasn't appropriate. In any case, Selena kind of took me off guard that day.

I could usually just walk up to a girl, spit my lines, have her on my arm in five minutes, and have her in my bed within the hour. Selena made me anxious for some reason. She made me awkward and I had grown out of that fucking stage. I was a grown man and this wasn't high school so why did I feel like it was.

She was the hot cheerleader and I was the nerdy band geek but even in high school, I knew how to get women. Selena was different.

"She's a lesbian." I said again. I hit my pen more furiously on the desk as I thought about this chick. I had to figure her out.

I had to find a way to see her again and to make sure that I wasn't fucking crazy. I had to redo my act so that she would get it this time. I thought I had her there for a minute but then she flipped on me.

To make matters worse, Jasper couldn't stop talking about her. He was always mentioning 'The Swan' from Plasma and I was about to blow his head off. She was mine to conquer and he just kept going on about how beautiful she looked that night at the club. I knew that already, what I wanted to know was how beautiful she looked with her clothes off.

Jasper and I had never fought over girls, it was never that serious but with Selena, it might come to that. I didn't care what he did with her after I was finished but I had to be first. He was trying to find her number in the Northwestern registry but wasn't having much luck since they had a lot of their records protected. I would get some sort of reprieve when he asked about the other girl with Selena that night but besides the giant taser, I didn't really remember her.

He didn't know that I had already made contact with Selena and I was planning on keeping that to myself. He would never let me forget it if he learned that I struck out.

Struck out?

Was that what this was?

I had never had to deal with this before so the fact that I was sitting here with a girl on my mind was unfounded. Maybe I should start seeing my therapist again. What the fuck was wrong with me? I usually had the mental strength of a tiger but now I felt more like a rabbit or some shit like that.

I had to get her out of my head or I was going to go insane.

The phone rang, jolting me out of my seat. I reached for my gun that was in the open top drawer of the desk but put it back once I realized it was nothing.

"Jesus." I calmed myself, "Pull it together Justin." I ran my hand through my hair and smoothed out my shirt like the person on the other end of the phone could see me.

I'm already going insane.

I picked up, "Bieber."

"Bieber? That's my phone answering reply." My father laughed.

"Oh, hi Dad." I shuffled some papers on my desk so it sounded like I was working, "Did you need something?"

"Can't a father call his son without me needing anything?"

"I guess." I said skeptically.

"So…how's it going? You've seemed distracted lately."

"Fine. Nothing to report. You know me, just daydreaming about what it would be like to be out there, enjoying my summer." I joked. We both knew that wasn't true.

"You get more like me every day. I was in your same position at that age." He sighed, "The thrill of youth."

"I've seen the pictures. Your youth days were pretty fulfilling if I remember correctly."

"Don't get me started. I remember one time…" He paused for a couple of second,"…well we won't get into that."

"Uh huh. Don't be ashamed or your wild days." I laughed.

"Okay, I see I need to keep things professional with you. I do have a reason for calling."

"I knew it."

"Anyway, we have an issue with the Japanese syndicate."

"Oh?"

"Did you read this morning's paper?"

"No, I didn't get the chance." I cradled the phone on my shoulder so that I could look up The Chicago Tribune on the computer, "Fill me in."

"Emmett should be calling you soon with the details but basically, Shinobu screwed us over."

"What did he do now? I swear, I told him to keep everything quiet."

"Well he's back in the states now but the shipment was caught trying to get into the country. Everyone's making a big deal about it. He got caught with my guns Justin." My father stressed and I heard an indication of terror in his voice.

The Cullens have several ways of getting what we needed into the country. If you were coming from the South America or Mexico, it was easy as driving across. The security down there was shit so no one really cared. Coming across an ocean was more difficult although not impossible. Guns were the hardest since they couldn't be concealed like drugs but over the years, my father had perfected his methods. I didn't know the real logistics of it all but what I did know was that we had a massive web of illegal activity under our name and had yet to be caught.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked him.

"I was smart enough to keep the destination under wraps so no one knows where the guns were headed but now they're sitting in some government warehouse. Those are mine Justin and someone has to pay for them because I have to hand them over to the Russians soon. "

"I know, I know." I went through records in my head, trying to figure out how much of a mess we were in, "What happened to Shinobu?"

"He's sitting pretty in his penthouse downtown since the Feds let him go. He just called me and apologized. Can you believe that? He apologized to me for losing my shipment. He didn't send money, compensation, nothing."

"Do we have to do this on a Saturday?" I groaned.

"You have something better to do?"

Yes, think about Selena.

"No." I replied.

"Then we're finishing this. I want my compensation and you boys need to go get it."

"Alright, fine. You'll have your guns by the end of the day Old Man."

My father's voice seemed to calm in an instant, "Thank you and tell your brothers to come over for dinner tonight. You're more than welcome if you want but I know how you like to go out on Saturdays."

"I'll be there." I hung up the phone and beat my head on the table.

There were few days when I would rather sit and do nothing than get out there with my gun but today was one of those days. I would have given anything to stay in bed but business called. What did normal twenty-five year olds do anyway? I would have to find out later.

I made a quick call to Jasper who was already geared up to go and then Emmett who was busy trying to make an inventory of what we needed. I was slightly impressed when he told me that he was already on the situation until he went off onto a tangent of the fun him and Rose had last night. That's Emmett for you. A layer of brains wrapped under a layer of muscle and then sexual stupidity.

I shut down my computer, straightened out my desk and then made sure I had everything I needed before leaving the office on the second floor of my apartment. I went into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water and shoved a granola bar down my throat before throwing my jacket over my shoulder. I locked up and set the security code before shutting the door to my apartment.

I was in the elevator a couple of seconds later and tapped my foot on the carpeted floor, noticing how ugly the thing looked. It was a drab beige color that had no life to it. It wasn't like I cared but since this was my building I wanted to make sure that it at least looked presentable. I made a mental note to have all the carpets changed. Other people lived here too but there wasn't any kind of association for these kinds of things. I made my own decisions.

The elevator dinged on Jasper's twenty-fifth floor and he sauntered in lazily while whistling a tune.

"Howdy." He waved, "You ready to deal with Yakuza street trash?"

"Always am. I brought my Browning 9x19 today." I flashed my gun that was situation prettily in my belt.

"I see you came prepared." He quirked an eyebrow.

"Got to with these fuckers." I growled just thinking about the shit I was about to put up with.

"Che cosa hai fatto ieri sera?" I asked him in Italian for no reason in particular.

What did you do last night?

He shrugged, "Seduto a casa a guardare la partita di baseball"

Sat at home and watched the baseball game.

I nodded to myself at how sad our lives were, "Hai saputo niente altro su Selena?"

Did you find anything else out about Selena?

"No, lei cerca di nascondersi da me." He replied with a smirk.

No, she's trying to hide from me.

I twisted my neck to loosen up the nerves that were starting to build just thinking about what sick thoughts that were going through Jasper's head. Selena wasn't his and I had to make that known but I didn't want to make myself seem too eager. He would never let me live it down if he found out that I was actually chasing a girl.

The elevator arrived on Emmett's floor and he came in with his head buried in a piece of paper. Like we were all on the same wavelength, he spoke in Italian, "Non parlare. Sono woking"

Don't talk, I'm working.

We all stayed silent until we reached the garage level.

"What do we need chief?" I asked Emmett as we went to the section that was blocked off for our cars only.

"Not much. "I'll tell you when we get there." He shrugged.

"I think we should take the Hummer today. We might be coming back with a lot." Jasper nodded towards Emmett's huge black tank of a truck that he bought for his month long fascination with off roading

"Great." I replied sarcastically as we stalked off towards the beast.

Emmett giddily jumped in front and started the thunderous engine that rattled the car to its core. I climbed in the front seat and Jasper got in the back. There was actually a harness that wrapped around my body for safety purposes.

"Who drives a Hummer in the city anyway?" I asked as I strapped myself in.

"Me." Emmett laughed evilly as he pulled out of the parking lot and whipped the car around like it was made of plastic. I said the rosary in my head as he raced out of the parking garage at an unhealthy speed for this tank.

We rattled and shook down the crowded streets of Chicago, making the cars below look like punk go-karts.

"I think some of us value our life." Jasper shouted from the back over the engine as Emmett took a turn at well over the speed limit.

"Whatever. This is nothing compared to the Yakuza den we're about to enter." Emmett gave another maniacal laugh but he was right.

Shinobu Moioka was about my age and another rival that I had to deal with when I was first starting out in this life. He was from a rich Japanese family that had ties in ancient Japan, dating back for centuries. Like the Cullens, the Moiokas were tough shit but dealt with things a lot differently. I guess they would be considered our Asian equivalent. Shinobu was wild and uncontrollable, making him sloppy. We wouldn't even be using him if his gun supply wasn't so good.

The father of the family was weak, letting his son rule over him without respect. Carlisle would never allow some of the things that went on in that family but to each his own I guess.

Shinobu was an American born, half French, half Japanese but he would fight anyone to the death if you said that. To him, he was full Japanese. His mother was some French model who had charmed her way into Shinobu's father's life. No one really acknowledged her though because she was an "outsider" since the two weren't married and she wasn't Japanese. It was that way with all mob families. The bloodlines had to be viable and connected to the old country in some way as far as marriages went.

Good thing Rose had Italian in her or Emmett might have to find him another girlfriend but that's beside the point. Shinobu didn't acknowledge his French side, leaving his mother out in the cold.

He was young, a partyer, drinker, smoker and we had had fun on some occasions whenever he was in town but I tried to keep my distance from him. He was too unmanageable for me and I was more than tempted to just kill him but that would start a Chicago battle that would have obliterated the entire city. Not a good thing.

"What the hell do you think he's going to be like today?" Emmett grumbled, obviously thinking the same thing I was.

"Ole' Shin Shin. We've had good times." Jasper laughed.

"I just hope he doesn't try to play Russian roulette like we did the last time." I rolled my eyes just thinking about how horrible that experience was.

"He is a trip." Jasper sighed, "I just want to make it home in one piece. Ma's making cioppino for dinner and I don't want to miss it."

"We'll be fine." Emmett waved it off like this was nothing.

Emmett pulled the Hummer onto the south end of North Jefferson Street and the polished apartments shinned on both sides.

"180." I said and pointed to the building where Shinobu lived whenever he was in Chicago. This area was known as the West Loop, catering to those Chicagoians who thought they had money and tried to show off but everyone knew all the real wealth was uptown.

"I just got il freddo." Jasper shuddered as we went into the underground parking garage.

Il freddo or The Chill, as we called it, was the feeling we all got when going into situations like these. It was our survival instinct telling us to run but at this point in our lives, we had been able to suppress that emotion. Now, a slight coldness would just creep through our bodies when we got into business mode.

"Stay on your toes." Emmett parked the tank and we all got out. I didn't bother getting my jacket because I needed to be free.

I shoved the Browning deeper into my belt as we walked towards the elevators. Two huge, Japanese security guards stood at the entrance with sunglasses and crossed arms, looking like something out of a comic book.

I let Jasper take the lead since he was the only one of us who spoke Japanese fluently although I could understand a lot of it.

Jasper spoke professionally and quickly, stating our business without any pleasantries.

Security Guard No. 1 made a rapid call that took three seconds before he hung up and stepped aside.

Jasper, Emmett and I walked into the glass elevator before pressing the penthouse button. The elevator shot up and Emmet pulled his list out of his pocket, handing it to me. I looked it over and got a gist of what my father wanted from Shinobu. Just a few handhelds and explosives, nothing too much but enough that I knew a shipment was going to be made to the house. There was no way we could bring all of that back even in Emmett's Hummer.

The guns for us but my father was acting as a halfway point between the Yakuza and the Bratva, the Russian version of the mafia. One thing that you learned in this underground world was that clans never mixed but somehow, my father had made friends with all of them and served as the buffer for many families that needed interactions completed and didn't want to do them themselves.

"This should be fun." I sighed as the elevator reached the top floor.

As soon as the doors opened, we were pulled out and frisked by more security guards who pushed us up against the wall. I had been through this many times so I knew what to do.

"Weapons?" A gruff voice asked and I emptied my pockets, showing I didn't have anything but my wallet and then flashed the gun in my belt.

"That's all I have." I replied dryly.

He eyed me skeptically and eyed him back, daring him to say something.

He nodded and let us by.

Jasper, Emmett and I walked down a long hallway with doors on each side. Windows were open to show the city below and I felt an odd sense of competitiveness as I compared Shinobu's building to mine. Call it a Freudian theory on male dominance but I always had to win whether it was a competition or not.

I knocked rapidly on the door at the end of the hall and even from the other side I could hear the thumping techno.

"Jesus, it's only two in the afternoon and I bet he's already plastered." Jasper muttered.

"Yeah." I agreed, "Let's just hope he has a clear head."

The door was flung open and another burly guard stepped aside for us to enter.

The whole apartment was filled with smoke that I could taste was marijuana and cigar. The shades were drawn, not letting any light in and strobe balls were on the floor, casting oddly shaded colors over the walls. It was like a fucking club in here but I guess that was Shinobu's style. Life was a club to him. Naked Japanese women waved to us as we walked through the apartment though they had no appeal to me. I was here for business, we'll talk about pleasure later.

Shinobu was situated in a steaming hot tub in his sunken living room with a group of girls around him, a thick cigar hanging out of his mouth and a glass of bourbon in his hand.

"Boys, I was wondering when I was going to get a call from you!" He shouted when we came in. I had to roll my eyes at his fake Japanese accent that he had acquired over the years, trying to mask his true heritage.

"Shinobu." I nodded professionally.

"What's with the stick up your ass Eddie? Come on in, have a drink." He replied.

"I don't' think so." Jasper spoke from next to me, "We're here for our father's guns, the ones that are currently in lockup thanks to you." He clarified.

He brushed it off, acting like he had no idea what we were talking about, "Please. I sent those guns off two days ago."

"Really? The same guns that we didn't get?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, it's not my fault."

"All I know is that I came here to pick up compensation. You lost the shipment so you have to give us something to work with." I stopped beating around the bush. Now was not the time to be nice.

"You Bieber boys think you rule the world, don't you?" He jumped out of the tub, grabbing a towel to wrap around his waist, "It's not like I meant to get the stuff caught up in customs but if those fuckers didn't feel the need to check everything…"

"I thought you have people in customs?" Emmett walked around, trying to get as far away from Shinobu as possible. They had never really gotten along.

"Well, obviously something fell through." He snapped and glared at us.

"We're not leaving until we have our father's stuff." Jasper was very stern and made his point clear by pulling his gun out for the entire world to see. "You know how Carlisle can get about his guns."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw guards at the ready, hands on weapons, feet in the attack position.

"This isn't going to go down that road." Shinobu sighed. He wasn't stupid and a shootout in his apartment wouldn't end well for him, "You'll get your stuff." He snapped his fingers and the girls were removed from the room, the security was thinned out and covered tables were brought in on rollers.

The sheets were ripped from the tables to reveal shinning guns and beautiful firearms. My whole body seemed to know it was in the presence of superior artillery and I felt like I was having sex. It was the same kind of high for me.

I circled the tables, trying to quickly see what was needed. Emmett picked up an impressive Kel-Tec RFB, It was one of those long sniper rifles that you saw in the movies but never thought was real.

"Are these the new ones?" Emmett asked as he held it in the shooting position, his eye looking through the scope.

"Yep." Shinobu replied proudly, "Twenty-six inches of perfect stainless steel, fluted barrel, plus a suppressor. Has a muzzle velocity in excess of 3000 feet per second and can pop someone off from a good mile or so."

I almost jumped over the table to steal the thing from Emmett. It was so sleek and beautiful but I kept my cool.

"How many do you have?" Jasper asked in a clipped tone.

"Five right now but I owe Carlisle six. I have other rifles if you want to take a look. This is all I have until my next trip back home so your father will just have to make do with what is here."

This fucker was starting to get on my last nerves. Who the hell did he think he was? He was playing with someone else's money here and it was completely unacceptable for him to be messing with my shit.

Two hours later, Jasper, Emmett and I were walking out of Shinobu's apartment building with written agreements for the shipments to arrive on Carlisle doorstep within the next twenty-four hours. No exceptions. The amount of money he owned us wouldn't have been enough to sell his blood to a vampire and Shinobu knew he was in deep horse crap. If we had to make another trip to him to get our stuff, we might leave with his head in a bag. Carlisle didn't play around with his shit and expected the best from whoever he was working with. I actually feared for Shinobu's life if he didn't pull through.

"That wasn't as bad as I thought." Emmett said as he pulled out of the parking garage, heading towards Esme's.

"That's because he was high and sedated." I snickered.

"Whatever, I like the new Shinobu."

On the ride home, that damned, brunet popped back into my head.

Selena…

It was weird how easy it was to push her out of my head but no matter how hard I tried, she always came back like a mosquito or a parasite. That's what she was, a parasite.

What happened to the strong, unwavering Justin who never looked back at a girl? What happened to the strength of the tiger?

I shook my head, trying to clear my damn thoughts but she was always there so I just had to focus on something else.

As we pulled up to the front gate of my parent's house, I thought of what my father would do in this situation. He was more of a softie than I was and he would say something like I needed to court Selena but that was pointless. I just wanted sex. What was the point of making an effort if I was just going to throw her away?

That thought made my stomach churn for some reason. Throw her away? Then someone else might have her.

I actually scratched the skin of my arm like a meth addict as I thought more and more about how I was going to get Selena into my bed. It was like planning a war with my million man army against her lone brown eyes.

I was certifiably insane.

"Hey, do you have pen?" Tyler asked from behind me.

"No. You ask me that every day and every day I say that same thing. Leave me alone." I snapped without turning around.

I refocused my thoughts back on the professor at the front of the cavernous, arena style classroom.

Another Monday was upon us and even though I had only spent a week in school, it felt much longer. I was in a bad mood. Not only was it "that time of the month" but I was more frustrated than ever because those damn shades of green were still haunting my dreams. He was still haunting my dreams.

If I knew college was going to be this hard, I would have stayed in Forks. But the thing was, nothing was as hard as suppressing the attraction I was feeling for Justin.

I had met the man twice and he was controlling me. It was scary to the point of sleep deprivation. I didn't even want to close my eyes at night because he would be there, watching me, taunting me, loving me.

Oh yes, I went there.

The sex dreams were the worst because I couldn't do anything about them. Nothing short of stick my hand down my underwear provided me with any kind of release but even after I was done, my body was still wound tight like a coil because they were just fantasies, dreams, nightmares. Nothing was like the real physical touch of his hands and I was about to jump off a building from insanity.

I kept tabs of my sins in my head because I figured that I would have to recite them to St. Peter at the gates of heaven. I wasn't a religious person by any means but even I knew that the intense lustful thoughts I was having were enough to send me to hell if I didn't repent. The dangerous thing about it all was that I could have cared less.

I used to live my life with some sort of morality but in my head, all bets were off when it came to Justin. If he came to me tomorrow and said that he wanted me to strangle Alice, I would have done it just to feel his lips on mine. He was controlling me like a puppeteer and I was slightly scared by that.

The only form of solace I got was that I never had to see Justin again. I wasn't planning on ever going back to Plasma and he was twenty-five so it wasn't like we ran in the same circles. Chicago was big enough that he could live on one side and I could live on the other. We wouldn't have to even cross paths and I was thanking every God in heaven for that.

To be honest, I didn't even have time to think about Justin unless I was sleeping because I was so busy otherwise. I quickly found out that the Northwestern curriculum was demanding for a reason. The university was trying to crank out the top lawyers, businessmen, engineers, and doctors in the whole country so a lot was required from us. I was keeping up but it took work.

I had adjusted pretty well, all thanks to Alice and my life fell into an easy routine that I liked. I would wake up and basically spend all day in class, fall into trances about Justin during my downtime, go back to my dorm and study with Alice, eat when I needed and then sleep, dreaming about Justin again.

He was riding to high on my priorities list for me and I was going to have to find a way to bring him down.

"Are you sure you don't have a pen?" I felt a tap on my shoulder again.

"You want a pen?" I quickly spun around and threw it at Tyler's head, "There. Stop bothering me."

Tyler Crowly had to be the most annoying boy I had ever met but no matter how hard I tried, he wouldn't leave me alone. He was cute, nothing as beautiful as Justin but was there any male specimen out there who could compare to my green eyed man? No.

Tyler was tall, tanned, blonde haired and hazel eyed. He was a year older than me and made sure everyone knew what a great hockey player he was. All the girls were going crazy because of him but I seemed to be the only one turned off by his arrogance. What was it with guys and their egos? It wasn't flattering at all.

In any case, Alice said he liked me, which I already knew but I was trying to deny it with all my being. Every day he would ask me for a pen and then give it back when he realized he had one in his pocket. His arrogance made him annoying and his annoyance made him childish. He wouldn't leave me alone. He had already asked me out on two occasions and I had of course said no but it didn't seem to faze him any. He was a chaser.

"Thanks for the pen but I just found one." He whispered over my shoulder and handed mine back to me, making sure to brush his hand past my hair. I cringed slightly and then refocused on my literature professor.

I was intrigued by this class because it was so difficult but right up my alley. It was more of a contemporary classical literature class, dealing with books that made an impact on America in the 20th century. I was soaking up the information like a sponge and really enjoyed class discussions although Tyler and sometimes even my mental Justin kept my thoughts occupied.

Our first assigned book was Upton Sinclair's The Jungle, a hard hitting look at the Chicago based meatpacking industry in the early part of the 1900s. It was famous for shinning light on the depravity and pure horror of the meat plants that employed immigrants for basically nothing. It was a journalistic piece disguised as fiction but still got Sinclair's message across. In high school, I only got through the first half of the book before I had to put it down. The filth, grime, and muck that were presented in the novel were a little too much for me. This go-round, I was doing slightly better and was almost finished with it.

I took a glance at the page I was currently on and decided to read a little more.

All day long the blazing midsummer sun beat down upon that square mile of abominations: upon tens of thousands of cattle crowded into pens whose wooden floors stank and steamed contagion; upon bare, blistering, cinder-strewn railroad tracks, and huge blocks of dingy meat factories, whose labyrinthine passages defied a breath of fresh air to penetrate them; and there were not merely rivers of hot blood, and carloads of moist flesh…

That was as far as I was going to get in this class period. I had to read the thing in installments because it was so disgusting.

I felt Tyler's foot tapping on the back of my chair and I was tempted to turn around and beat the shit out of him but I didn't feel like it. I barely had enough energy to keep my eyes open all thanks to Justin's dream hold on me. I was woken up at three this morning with sweat all over my body and my mind racing with sexual fantasies that would have made a prostitute blush.

"So class, that's all I have for today. Make sure you read the last few chapters of the book and be prepared for a quiz on Friday." The professor spoke loudly so that everyone could hear him.

I started to gather my things and the classroom filled with the noise of scarping chairs and stacked papers.

"Hey, Selena." Tyler's voice came from behind me. I hung my head, hoping he would go away, "I was just wondering if you could help me out with this book. It's really kicking my ass." He came in front of me.

"No, I can't help you."I clipped.

"Why?"

"Because I saw your last quiz grade. You should be helping me."

He shrugged, "I can do that. You need me to come over or something?"

I gave him a pitiful look before I just turned around to leave, my backpack over my shoulders but he caught up with me.

"Okay, I was just kidding. I don't need help but I want to see you…outside of school."

"Are you asking me out again? This is what, the third time?"

"You keep shutting me down." He jutted out his lip in a pout that was incredibly embarrassing for him but he didn't seem to mind.

"Let's just say that I say yes, then what?" I gave him the option and he brightened up.

"Well then I would take you out and we would have an incredible time."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes." He answered simply.

"Okay, we'll go out…one time." I held up my finger, "And that's it. If I don't like the date, then you have to stop asking me."

"Really? Sweet!" He pumped his fist in the air.

"One time, Tyler." I yelled after him as he ran up the stairs.

"I'll call you later. Don't worry Selena, you're going to love it." He bumped into the door on his way out but that couldn't stop the bounce in his step.

"I highly doubt that." I muttered to myself as I went up the stairs and followed the stream of students outside.

I didn't have another class until later that afternoon so this was the time Alice and I usually went to lunch.

I walked outside into the bright sunlight and my eyes immediately went to Alice who was sitting on a bench in jeans and a hot pink jacket that astronauts could probably see from space. Her heels were making holes in the grass and she had a pair of cat-like sunglasses with pointed, rhinestone covered rims.

I was slightly embarrassed by her but then realized that this was Alice and there was no changing her so I might as well get used to it.

"Hello, my love." Alice jumped off the bench when I approached and wrapped her arms around me.

"Hi." I patted her back.

"How was class?" She let go and began lively skipping off towards the dining hall where we always ate.

"Good. I'm almost done with The Jungle."

"Yuck, I hate that book."

"Me too but it's not that bad if you don't think about it."

"Still, I won't be reading it anytime soon. Was Tyler annoying again?"

"Yes but I think I found a way to shut him up. I said yes when he asked me on another date…"

"You did what?" She pulled her glasses down over her nose.

"I said yes but only one date. I know it won't go well so I told him that after this, we're through. He's become way too irritating."

"So…what you're saying here is that I can dress you up?"

"Is that all you got from that conversation?" I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah." She tapped her chin, "I think I need to go shopping again. Don't worry, I'll spare you but you have to wear what I say."

"Whatever, Alice. Just don't make me look like a slut. I'm still not over Plasma."

"I know, I might as well put Justin's picture as your screensaver." She giggled.

"Shut up. You said you weren't going to talk about him anymore."

"I can't help it. You just get so hazy eyed when I even say his name. It's hilarious."

I had told Alice a partial version of the feelings I was having and she thought it was funny that I was being tortured by my imaginative crush.

What a friend!

Alice and I ate lunch as usual. By the time my last class was over, I was starting to regret my decision to go out with Tyler because Alice wouldn't stop talking about it. She was determined to get me a boyfriend by the time Halloween approached.

I finished the day up like I always did, studying in my room after a rather long call from my mother who wanted to know when I was coming to visit her in Florida. I really didn't know when that would be but I replied with a 'soon' and that seemed to keep her at bay. I called Charlie before I attempted to sleep but just like every other night, Justin ripped through my mind, making it impossible for me to even close my eyes.

By the time Friday rolled around, I had gotten maybe fifteen hours of sleep collectively from five days. That was a problem. This wasn't healthy. It might have sounded better if I was up all night studying but that was never the case.

I sat in my literature class, tapping my pen on my desk as I focused on the quiz that I had already completed. I breezed through it easily. Tyler had moved his seat from behind me to next to me. We were so far up in the room that we could talk without getting caught.

"Are you ready for our date tonight?" He whispered to me.

"Stoked." I replied dryly.

"It's going to be awesome. I'll come get you at seven."

"Where are we going?" I asked, just trying to take my mind off of this mundane quiz. I had already checked over it three times.

"Downtown to a nice restaurant."

"I don't want you spending too much money."

Especially on one date that won't ever go anywhere.

"It's no problem. Dad just sent me a money order so I'm ready for a night out on the town."

Tyler was from that rich side of society where his parents spent their lives in Europe, leaving him to bounce from boarding school to boarding school. The amount of money he had only added to his superiority that he thought he deserved.

"Oh well then by all means, spend away." I said sarcastically.

"Sure thing. You won't ever want to go on a regular date again." He smiled proudly.

I kept my head down for the rest of the class, checking over my quiz four, five, six times. If I didn't get a perfect score, I was dropping out.

"Okay, so I'll see you at seven, right?" Tyler asked for conformation when we were turning in our papers on the front desk.

"Yes and I'll be ready with a smile." I said as mockingly as possible so that he knew I was not going to have fun but his head was too thick to get it.

"Awsome. Don't forget, seven." I think I saw him prance out of the room.

"I should just kill myself right now."

I got back to my dorm at five that afternoon with a very annoyed Alice sitting on my bed with her arms crossed.

"I don't know how I feel about you having a key anymore." I said as I put my bag down.

"Too bad. Why are you late?"

"I had to go print of some notes in the library."

"Well now I only have two hours to turn you into something beautiful." She pouted.

"Oh, well thanks for the wonderful shot of confidence."

"Shut up. Get into the shower." She pushed me towards the bathroom.

After my shower, I was sat in front of the mirror while Alice did my makeup, which she insisted that I needed done since I was on the prowl for a boyfriend and my lack of sleep had left bags under my eyes that made me look like a raccoon. Following my makeup, my hair was put in a stylish messy bun that sat at the base of my neck and left a few tendrils of long curly hair to frame my face.

"Okay, now for the dress I picked out. It's so cute." Alice pulled me into the room.

"I hope it covers up some skin." I said as I sat on the bed.

"It will do." She shrugged and fumbled in a bag for something, "And I don't want you complaining about the shoes either. Here it is."

She held up a dress that look too tight and too sophisticated for me but I was done fighting her.

The dress was a two toned cocktail number that had a ruched, white, one shoulder top and a sleek banded, black skirt on the bottom. I put it on and just like I suspected, the thing fit like a glove around my body, showing off my waist. It stopped at a respectable length a couple of inches above my knee and I looked surprisingly mature.

"You look so cute. Okay, now time for shoes." Alice bounced, "Don't say a word about them." She held up a pair of terrifying pumps that would probably be the death of me.

"Alice…"

"I know, I know but they look so good with the dress. I want you to look nice."

"I would look fine in something two inches shorter."

"But…they don't even make heels that short." She said confused.

I gave her a look to say that she wasn't fooling me and she rolled her eyes.

"Okay fine. I knew you would complain so I got a different pair. These will be a little better." She got some more shoes out of the bag that were a more respectable height.

"Those are better." I took them from her hand and slipped on the closed toed, black, pumps that had a red sole. I knew enough about shoes to detect that the bottom meant Christian Louboutin. I didn't even want to know how much they cost because I would probably pass out.

"There." Alice nodded in approval, "And your purse." She handed me a black clutch, "Don't lose this one."

"I didn't lose the last one. Edw…He stole it. I know he did."

"Whatever Selena just make sure you bring everything back."

An hour later, there was a happy knock on the door and I got up from my seat to answer it. Alice had left me awhile ago so I could just cop out of this date if I wanted to but I knew that would only make Tyler more persistent.

I opened the door and found him in a nice pair of slacks, a pressed white shirt and a dinner jacket that was left open.

"You look amazing." Tyler eyed me up and down.

"Thank you." I closed the door behind me and made sure I had my key. I decided to not be so mean to the poor boy. Even though I knew this wasn't going anywhere, I could have a good time and make up some excuse as to why I didn't want to go out with him anymore.

"So, you ready to go?"

"Yes. Where are we off to?" I asked as we got into the elevators.

"My favorite restaurant, Carmel. Its downtown and everyone loves it."

"Sounds good to me. I don't know anything else so you could take me to Burger King and I would be fine."

"You're too beautiful for Burger King." He tried to take my hand but I scrambled to fix with my hair, keeping it occupied.

We got off of the elevators and there was a cab already waiting outside. Tyler opened my door and then situated himself next to me in the back. He gave clear and concise directions to the driver who sped off into the crowded streets. The drive was silent but not uncomfortable. Tyler kept humming, trying to fill the silence and I just looked out of the window.

The lights of the city still amazed me when I saw them at night. They kind of reminded me of the stars back in Forks, which I didn't see much anymore. You can't see stars in a city so it was nice to have some reminder of home.

We got to the restaurant half an hour later, made longer by the traffic we had to battle.

"Here we are." Tyler paid the cab driver and then helped me out of the back.

The front of Carmel was very modern, covered in earth tones and big windows. We went inside where Tyler gave his name before we were escorted to our booth in a corner. Carmel was a nice restaurant that evoked the feeling of a Japanese rock garden. There were soft waterfalls and glowing lights on the tables along with bamboo shoots that added accents to the massive dining room, which held maybe fifty tables.

I sat in the booth on the side facing the entrance because it was closer to the waterfall behind me and I needed anything I could to make this night better.

"This is nice." I said as I read over the menu, "I hope you aren't going to spend a lot of money."

"Don't worry about it. I just wanted to take you out. You don't know how long I've been trying to get you to say yes. I guess all my pushiness paid off." He grinned.

"I guess."

After we ordered drinks and an appetizer, Tyler went off at the mouth. He talked about everything under the sun and I tried to stay focused but I couldn't. I ended up just playing with the ice in my glass as he continued to drone on about himself. I looked at him in the eyes, making sure he thought I was listening but my mind was trying to figure out what I was going to do with my Saturday tomorrow.

"…and then he fell on his ass." Tyler threw his head back and laughed.

I joined in like I knew what was going on but I could have cared less. It was during my hearty, fake laugh that I started to feel weird….off for some reason. The air seemed to get chillier and my body shuddered.

"Are you cold?" Tyler asked.

"No, I'm fine." I answered and I felt my legs get a slight breeze as my napkin fell from my lap.

While I was under the table, searching for my napkin, I saw the red pumps of a woman with slender legs and the Italian loafers of an obviously wealthy man. I would have thought nothing of it if the voice that sounded didn't seep into my bones.

"This will be fine." I heard Justin say from somewhere near me but by that time, his shoes had disappeared from my sight.

I jerked up and slammed my head on the table, causing it to shake a little.

"Damn." I rubbed the spot of my skull where I hit it as I resurfaced.

"Are you okay?" Tyler looked worried.

"Yeah, I'm great." I said through gritted teeth.

"Good. You're kind of clumsy aren't you." He laughed.

"Yes but I've always been that way." I answered, not caring.

I was trying my hardest not to move around to see if it really was Justin I saw or just a mirage but I could tell it was him and if I smelled correctly, he was in the booth right behind me. He smelled of fresh cut grass and a slight hint of tobacco. I know that sounds strange but it was the way he smelled when I met him at the fountain and I almost fell at his feet because it was so enticing.

My breathing increased and I felt some sweat on my brow that I quickly wiped away.

"Is it hot in here?" I whispered to Tyler.

"I thought you were cold a couple of seconds ago?" He said strangely.

"You're right. What were we talking about?"

"I honestly forgot." He thought.

He started talking again but I couldn't have cared less. Tyler's stupid voice was drowned out by Justin's velvet words that seemed to pour from his lips. I almost combusted right there. I couldn't distinguish who he was talking to but there was no mistaking that it was him.

I knew what this was.

This was God punishing me for my sins over the past week. All those lustful thoughts were my downfall and I was being punished…hard.

"I'll be right back." I felt the booth behind me move as Justin got up from his seat. I shifted so that there was no way he would brush me as he walked away.

"I think we should go." I said quickly when Justin ducked out of sight near the door.

"Why? Our food isn't even here yet." Tyler looked around.

"My stomach hurts." I made up a quick excuse.

"Oh, really." He looked kind of bummed out, "I guess we can go out again another night."

Damn.

"Or we can go somewhere else. I don't think I'm in the mood of sushi." I pleaded with him.

"That's okay. I can call someone over and have them cancel our order if you want."

"That would be great."

"But only if you promise to come back here with me. It is my favorite after all."

I was about to make up another excuse when I saw Justin coming back into the dining room. I quickly grabbed the menu off of the table and pretended like I was reading it while peeking over the edge.

He wasn't looking directly at me but that didn't stop his green eyes from penetrating my entire soul. I thought I was going to shoot off into space. I still didn't know the exact color but I had a new found urge to find out and couldn't wait to get back home so I could Google search until the early morning.

He was in a very stylish pair of black pants that fit him as if he were born in them, a light blue shirt that was pressed to perfection and his Italian loafers probably cost more than my tuition. His wrist was adorned with a gleaming silver watch and I noticed that he tried to style his hair tonight. That almost made me laugh because it was done in such a poor way.

The way he walked was mesmerizing and like it was all happening in slow motion, I saw him lift one of his long fingers to his mouth, trying to wipe the corner. I was done. I was either going to murder everyone in this restaurant or strap Justin to my truck to drive him off to my lair.

I hid my face until Justin passed again, sitting down in his seat. His smell washed past me and my eyes rolled back into my head like a nymphomaniac.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Tyler asked, this time with more worry in his voice.

"I'm fine." I put the menu down softly. I probably looked like some crazy person to him but this all seemed normal in my head, "We can stay here if you want." I said partly because I didn't feel coming back out with him but also because I didn't want to leave Justin as stupid as that sounds.

My foot bounced up and down for a couple minutes, without anything to do but sit in this purgatory.

I was less than a couple of inches away from the man I had been fantasizing over for the past week and I couldn't even touch him. I couldn't see him. I couldn't speak to him.

I still remembered what a jerk he was at the fountain but I was sure I could live through that if he just fucked the hell out of my on this table.

"Calm the hell down." I whispered to myself.

"What was that?" Tyler asked after he took a sip of water.

"Nothing. I was just…" I couldn't think of what to say but thankfully, I didn't have to because our food came at that moment.

"Wow, this looks great." I said enthusiastically. I was trying to get this over with as soon as possible.

"Yeah it does." Tyler clapped his hands together.

I had ordered a spicy tuna roll but was slightly disappointed that I had to use chopsticks. I wasn't the best at them but I would make it work.

Tyler and I started eating and he was talking the whole time but Justin's voice was like a foghorn in my head. He was having dinner with some girl named Vienna and I didn't know who she was but apparently, he was mad at her. He was saying things like 'we won't ever have anything together' and 'all we had was sex, nothing more, get that through your head'. This was obviously a breakup dinner for him.

I would have loved to be in her position right now. To just have sex with Justin would have made me fall over and die. I didn't know who this Vienna was but a sudden surge of rage and jealousy filled me. I wanted to spin around and rip her hair out for even sitting with my Justin. I felt like he was mine and mine only.

Oh, no. My possessiveness is coming out over a guy I hardly know.

I thought in my head about how many sins I had racked up in the past hour.

Greed, check.

Wrath, check.

Envy, check.

Lust, double check.

Four out of seven was not a good percentage.

Justin's voice was stern throughout his speeches and I wanted so much to turn around and see what was going on but I couldn't bring myself to move.

"Selena, are you sure you know how to use those?" Tyler asked as I fumbled with my chopsticks and sushi.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm not a pro but I can at least pick things up."

"You look like you're struggling. Do you need help?"

"No, I got it." I replied.

Do you know when you have some occurrence you created that seems to transpire in slow motion? That was what happened next.

My left chopstick slipped, flinging the roll I was holding behind me. I watched with wide eyes as the sushi flipped in the air a couple of times over my head and then disappeared. What the hell kind of physics made it possible for me to do that?

Tyler had went back to eating so he didn't notice but I sure did and holy hell, it landed with a thud on the table behind me.

Shit.

Shit.

Shit!

I didn't move. I didn't breathe and closed my eyes tight.

"Uh…ma'am." I felt a tap on my shoulder and Justin's voice filled my ears, "I think this is yours."

"No it's not." I replied quickly.

"I think it is." Justin said again.

"No it's not. It's not mine." I mumbled and opened my eyes.

Tyler was looking at me like I had grown another head with his tilted sideways. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Justin's long fingers trying to push the sushi roll over the partition that separated the booths.

"It's no problem. I can throw it away if you want." He was being so nice, nothing like the Justin I met at the fountain.

"No, leave me alone."

"Ma'am, I don't mean to be rude but I don't want your sushi so you need to take it back."

"Thank you." I snatched it from him without turning my head, "I think we need to go." I said to Tyler, "My stomach really hurts."

"Okay, let me get a waiter." He called one over but I knew it was too late.

I could feel eyes on me from behind and Justin leaned over the booth, "Selena, is that you?" He asked with what I think was hopefulness in his voice.

I turned my head away "No."

"Really, what's your name?" The smug voice of Justin dick Bieber came back.

"Jessica." It was the first thing I could come up with.

"Oh well, excuse me." He repositioned himself in his booth. I could hear him muttering to himself behind me.

I kept my head almost turned all the way in a 180 position for a couple of seconds just to make sure I was out of the line of fire. When I turned back, I saw not one man but two sitting across from me. One was Tyler and the other, Justin who had a crooked grin that made my panties go damp.

"I knew it was you. You think you can hide from me?" His voice was as smooth as butter and jesting.

Tyler looked incredibly annoyed and confused, "Selena, do you know this guy?"

"Not really." I hung my head, fearing that if I looked Justin in the eyes, I might jump the table.

"I think you should leave." Tyler spoke up but Justin didn't even acknowledge him.

"So Selena, how have you been?" He asked and crossed his arms over the table. He started picking up pieces of bread crumbs in a stealthy but almost neurotic way. It almost made me think of an OCD special I had seen on TV one time.

"Fine, you?" I moved some hair out of my face and sat up straighter, determined not to let him win whatever game he was playing.

"Good. You look very beautiful tonight." His eyes went straight to my chest and then up my neck to my face. I could almost feel his hand along with them.

"Is that a real compliment or are you just trying to get me to sleep with you again?"

"Well…both I guess." He shrugged like it was nothing and poor Tyler just looked at us with his mouth open.

"Don't you have a date to get back to?" I crossed my arms, mirroring him.

"She went to the bathroom." I checked behind me to make sure he wasn't lying and sure enough, she was gone.

"Well you're interrupting mine."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is that what this was?" He mocked me, "I didn't realize."

"Go back to your seat Justin. What are you even doing here?"

"This is Jasper's restaurant. I eat free."

This is getting ridiculous.

Of all the fucking restaurants in this city, I had to sit here in Jasper's. This was God trying to punish me again. I just know it's him.

"It was nice to see you again but if you don't mind, I would like to get back to my date." I pointed to Tyler, "I was having a wonderful time."

"Of course." Justin got up and brushed off his shirt, "It was nice seeing you again Selena." He nodded before going to sit back behind me.

I let out a deep breath and regained my thoughts.

"We really need to go." I said.

"I agree. This is creepy." Tyler asked for the check and it was brought a couple of minutes later.

While he was dealing with paying, I felt a warm hand slip a piece of paper in mine.

"If you ever want to have some fun and not hang around pussies for the rest of your life, give me a call." Justin whispered into my ear.

I secretly flipped the paper over and read it under the table. It was his business card and I quickly stuffed it in my purse.

"You wish." I whispered back harshly.

"That I do." I heard him chuckled, "Don't you want a good fuck?"

Yes!

"No, you're rude and condescending. I can go without."

"Yeah right. You're about to burst."

"Well then maybe I'll ask Tyler for some sexual relief."

I think I heard a growl or a low roar from behind me but as far as I knew, there weren't any animals in here.

"I could help you better than he could." Justin said in a stressed tone. I grinned when I realized that I struck a nerve.

"I'm not so sure about that. You look like you don't have much experience." I smirked at my tactics at winning this war.

"You have no idea what I'm capable of in the bedroom. I can make you feel things that you could only dream about." Justin was so close to my ear, I could feel the moisture from his breath.

Tyler still hadn't noticed since he was haggling with a waiter but I could have given a damn if he did.

"I'll take care of it myself." I whispered back.

"I bet you could and I would love to watch that." His breath was so close to the nape of my neck, I almost felt it inside my skin, "Or I could help."

"I said I don't need your help." I snapped.

"I bet you're so tight and wet right now. Put your finger in your pussy and let me taste."

I had to sit up straighter and cross my legs because his dirty talk was about to do me in.

"I'm going to file a report against you."

"Go ahead, then you'll always wonder what could have been. I can make you feel incredible, Selena."

"I don't need your help." My voice at this point was nothing more than a faint pant.

"You just watch. One of these days, you're going to fall."

"Don't be so sure of it. I don't plan on ever seeing you again."

I got up from my seat and Tyler did the same as we both walked out of the restaurant.

I chanced a small glance back at Justin once we reached the door and found him sitting with Vienna again, a wicked smirk on his perfect lips.

Please God, stop punishing me!

[anavoliselenu]

Beautiful lies chapter 15

"The money is yours. I never wanted to pay for sex, Selena. I just didn’t want that asshole bidding on you at the auction to go home with you. You were too good, too pure and beautiful to belong to him." His admission takes my breath away. I feel helpless and out of control and I want to cry.

"I’ve spent a good chunk of the money on Becca’s treatment, and I have no way to repay you, but the rest I could return to you," I stammer.

"First off, I would never accept repayment. Had I known Becca before all this started, I would have gladly paid to enroll her in the experimental treatment program. And I’d never expect you to return the money."

"I don’t feel right keeping the remainder of the money."

"It’s yours to do with what you wish."

This conversation is like a game of ping-pong and my brain feels fuzzy.  "So how would this work?" I ask, shocked to see I’m actually considering it.

"You agreed to give me six months," he reminds me.

"I also agreed to give you my virginity," I add.

"But I didn’t take that."

"No, you didn’t," I agree. A fact that I’m painfully aware of.

"Are you still intact?" he asks, his tone raspy and deep.

A warm current zips through me, flushing my cheeks and soaking my panties. "Of c-course." My voice is hoarse and Justin’s dark eyes roaming on mine make it impossible to speak clearly.

I see the vein throb at the base of his throat. "Good girl," he admonishes.

I’d waited twenty-one years, did he really think I’d just thrown it away with some random guy in the two weeks we’d been apart? Why do I sense this is all some carefully crafted ploy to keep me here in his bed? "Where will I sleep?" I ask.

His mouth turns down just a fraction. "Wherever you like."

"A guest room I suppose," I say more to myself than to him as I think of his strange proposition.

"If you prefer."

He’s being so amiable, so accommodating. The change is refreshing after the emotional hell he’s put me through. I’m still unsure about what exactly he’s proposing and if he really expects me to remain living here for the next six months, but for some strange reason, I don’t hate the idea. We watch each other in silence for several moments, each of us digesting what it would mean for us to be just friends. My heart hurts just thinking about it. It would mean I couldn’t touch him, I wouldn’t feel the heat of his body pressing adamantly against mine. I release a little sigh. "If you’re set on me keeping the money, I assume I’m free to spend it however I wish?"

"Of course you can," he says.

"Then I’d like to donate it to your charity work in Africa."

A slow smile uncurls on his lips. "Okay then."

***

I’d only come to Los Angeles to gather my belongings from the mansion and get closure from Justin by listening to whatever it was that he wanted to tell me. Instead, I find myself moving my clothing from his master closet into a guest room down the hall that smells of lint and furniture polish.

The bed is dressed in shell blue linens and the furniture is modern, clean lines in white enamel. A large mirror hangs on the wall and decorative sconces flank either side of the cream upholstered headboard.

I pull open the white gauzy drapes shading the large picture windows and look out at the pool below. A cool shudder passes through me and I wrap my arms around my middle. I have no desire to be anywhere near that pool and I snap the curtains closed, blocking it from view. Just seeing the crystal blue water sparkle in the sunlight brings on a fresh wave of pain and humiliation at the memory of Stella’s cold glare and icy tone as she informed me, in no uncertain terms, that she was his wife. The word wife –in relation to Justin– doesn’t resonate. Especially coming from that woman's mouth. I could never see him with someone like her. They just don’t fit. It makes me wonder if I even know him at all. An even better reason to remain friends while I figure that out. I want more with Justin. I want back that raw feeling of sexual energy that flows so easily between us whenever he’s near –but I will settle for friends – for now, as we navigate this bumpy road we’d found ourselves on.

After I’ve finished moving my meager belongings into my new room, I’m left feeling bored and alone. But rather than going to find Justin in this monstrous house, I flop down on the bed and dial Becca on my cell.

"Hey hey," she answers, chipper as ever, as though she hasn’t battled aggressive stage-four cancer for the past several years.

"Hi." Her strength and determination to live take my breath away and suddenly complaining to her about my dilemma with Justin seems childish and immature.

"What’s wrong?" she asks.

"Nothing," the lie slips easily from my mouth. "I just might be staying here longer than I expected."

"Oh? Did Mr. Sexy, Rich and Handsome win you back already?"

"Sort of," I admit. Justin had been more open and exposed than I had expected, and it tugged at something inside me. "He proposed that I continue living here and working with Kylie."

"And I take it you accepted?" she asks.

"I’m gonna try it," I confirm.

"I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t live with Mom and Dad either if I didn’t have to."

We don’t discuss the fact that she isn’t able to live on her own for health reasons. It hurts to even think about.

"And what about you guys?" she asks. "Are you a couple again, or what?"

"No." This time my voice is firm. "He said just as friends and I agreed. We’re going to take things slow while he works on his past."

"I think that’s a good idea. I know you were happy there. But what made you reconsider? He’s hung like a baby elephant, isn’t he?"

"Becca!" I chastise her. "Always with the sex on the brain."

"I can’t help it. It’s better to let my mind drift there than to something more morbid. Penis is my happy place."

I can hear her smile through the phone and I like it. "Penis is a good thing."

"So…what are you going to do about Justin’s peen?"

"Take it slow, just like he proposed. I’m pretty sure that means there’s no peen in my future."

"Boo. You’re boring. I’m going to go to McGilroy’s and get a hot fudge sundae."

"Appetite’s back?" I ask.

"Yup. I’ll be fat before you know it."

Yeah right. The idea of Becca anything other than stick-skinny would be a miracle. She has a hard time keeping food down and thus trouble with her weight. "Have fun. Love you."

"Love you too, but you’re the one who needs to have fun. Figure out a way to speed up his divorce so you can jump that boy."

"On it." I smile, and end the call.

I cradle the phone in my hands for several minutes after we end the call. God, I love my sister. After organizing my room the best I can, I decide to go off in search of Justin.

I find him sitting on a stool at the kitchen island, his tablet in front of him with an inbox full of emails that he’s clicking his way through.

"Am I interrupting?" I ask, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Of course not. Are you okay?"

I nod. "I just called Becca to tell her I’m staying."

He’s quiet, but his calm demeanor tells me this makes him happy.

Rather than sitting at the stool next to him, I round the kitchen island and stand across from him, leaning my elbows against the slab of granite.

He chuckles at me. "What’s on your mind, sweetness?"

I didn’t realize I was that obvious. I straighten my shoulders and relax the line crinkling my brow. "You and Stella…" I shouldn’t ask, I’m only torturing myself, but I can’t help it. I need to know, because I just can’t picture him with her. "I want to know the nature of your relationship. Was it like a regular marriage, with all the perks and benefits of marriage?"

He presses a button darkening the screen on his tablet and draws a steading breath. "What are you asking?"

"You lived here with her. I’m assuming this house is full of memories for you, and it’s just strange for me to think of you with another woman living here, sleeping together in the bed I shared with you…"

"What do you want to know?" Justin asks.

"I guess what I want to know is…were you happy? Stella, in my very brief interaction, seemed quite different from me." She was all hardened exterior, sharp edges and manicured to the last inch of her.

"You were different. Fuck, you are different, Selena."

I like knowing that perhaps what he and I shared was different from what he had with her. "How so?"

"You’re soft and sweet and gentle. You make me laugh."

"I hate that you have memories with her of things you and I never shared."

I’m sure he knows I’m talking about sex, and my cheeks flush slightly. He said we’re only friends, so why I'm pushing him to tell me about their sexual history, I have no idea. I sound like a jealous girlfriend, but I’m unable to stop myself.

Justin leans in toward me, his dark eyes pinning me in place. "Do you want to know why I only wanted oral sex with you?"

I nod, unable to resist the nugget of information he’s dangling in front of me.

"Because, that’s something Stella wouldn’t do."

"What are you saying?"

"I never fucked her mouth. I never completely lost myself with her. Each time with you – it was just us. There were no bitter memories to taint that. It was our thing."

His words send a rush of conflicting emotions skittering through me. My heartbeat thrums in my chest as I remember our erotic encounters with vivid clarity. "She wouldn’t…Why?"

He shrugs. "Said she didn’t like the taste. Of course, that’s exactly what I caught her doing to the gardener – deep throating him in the library. She seemed to like it just fine – as long as it wasn’t with me."

My heart aches for him. As pissed as I am, I’m beginning to understand the deep hurt and mistrust he’s carried around with him. I recall how he never seemed to want to go into that room and my heart softens just a bit. And I do like knowing that as trivial as it is, going down on him was something only I did. I guess I now understand his aversion to the library too.

"Being with her was a mere convenience. You are a choice. One I desperately want to make – if you’ll let me."

His words rattle me. I shouldn’t trust him – not after he lied about his past – made me believe he was single. Yet, there’s no denying part of me still wants him. "But you said friends." My voice is tiny. It would take little to no effort on his part to convince me we’d be better as more than friends. The heat buzzing between us is palatable and intense.

"For now, yes. I want you to trust me again. I won’t push you yet."

Yet. That word rings loudly in my head.  I swallow heavily, trying to decipher the deeper meaning behind his words. He wants me back, I’m sure of it. So why in the hell won’t he just divorce Stella and move on with his life? Two years of waiting her out seems extreme. Even for someone as stubborn and cocky as Justin.

"I’m sorry…" I apologize, though I’m not entirely sure for what. I just hate the thought of Colt finding that witch on her knees, giving to another man what she withheld from him.

"Don’t be," he says, coolly. But his eyes tell a different story. They’re dark and faraway, as if he’s fighting to escape the sour memories that follow him around the rooms of his own house.

I leave Justin to his work and find myself wandering the rooms of his house, ending in the library. I hate Stella. I can't say I've ever really hated anyone before, I hate Becca's cancer, I hate that Justin is married, but I absolutely fucking hate Stella. She's made a man who is so sweet under his hardened exterior question himself and his relationships. I stand there in the library, silently staring off into space for far too long.

When I find Justin in his office later, I convince him to leave his work for the night and get some sleep. The dark circles under his eyes tug at something inside me, but I resist the urge to wrap my arms around his neck. He is not mine to soothe.

We part ways at the top of the stairs and say goodnight. The walk to the guest room feels too long and just odd. As I crawl in between the cool sheets, my thoughts are squarely on the man down the hall.

***

The following day is interesting. A strange sense of unease grows as the day passes. We eat our meals together, I go for a jog, and Justin works at the kitchen island while I flip through a magazine, but I can’t help but feel something is off. We’re struggling to find our rhythm as just friends. I keep stealing glances at him, noticing the way his white t-shirt clings to his sculpted chest and I feel his eyes on my backside when I walk away. I hate that I can’t touch him.

Is it even possible to be friends with a man I want so desperately?

When night falls, I’ve showered and brushed my teeth and done my regular nightly ritual, but I’m anything but ready for bed. My body is wound too tight. I’m beginning to think this new arrangement I’ve agreed to will never work.

After tossing and turning for an hour, I decide to go to Justin. I know my actions – going into his bedroom in the middle of the night – will define how we spend our next several months, but I don’t care. I need to see him, to talk to him, to understand what I’m getting myself into.

I creep down the hallway on tiptoes like a stealthy intruder and tap gently on his door.

No response.

Maybe he’s already asleep.

I let myself in and my eyes search out the darkened room. His blankets are in a messy heap on the bed, but I don’t see any movement.

"Justin?" I whisper.

Nothing.

I creep closer and kneel at the edge of the mattress. Now that my eyes have adjusted to the pitch darkness, I can see he’s not here. The room is quiet and empty.

A pang of disappointment, followed by curiosity flares inside me.

I venture off in search of him.

Chapter Five

Selena

Nightfall has bathed the house in near total blackness, save for the little path lights that are strategically placed in outlets throughout the home. It’s just enough light for me to see as I navigate the stairs and head toward Justin’s office. I pass the den on my way and confirm he’s not in there. Perhaps he couldn’t sleep either and he’s gotten up to work. His blankets were strewn across his bed like he’d fought with them. My guess is that he attempted sleep, just like me, and lost the battle.

His office door is open and a lamp provides a swath of soft light. I hear grunting sounds and my stomach lurches.

I step around the doorway and I’m utterly shocked at what I find.

Justin is sitting in his leather chair, his pants are undone and his thick cock is standing proudly. His hand is moving up and down in short, uneven strokes and he’s grunting softly.

My pussy clenches at the sight of him. I release a tiny whimper and his eyes snap up to mine.

"Christ, Selena." He tucks himself back inside his pants, which is not an easy task. He’s rock hard and his engorged cock does not look happy to be stuffed into the confined space. I wince just watching him.

"Don’t you fucking knock?" he barks in my direction.

"The door was open," I murmur, feeling idiotic.

He looks behind me to the open doorway. "I suppose it was. What are you doing out of bed though?"

"I think the better question is, what are you?" I feel cheeky and want to watch him squirm a bit at being caught. Except he’s collected and composed, and continues watching me calmly.

He shakes his head at me, obviously not taking the bait. "Don’t ask questions that you’re not prepared to hear the answers to."

I’m not sure what he means, but I cross the room and stand before him, my legs still shaky from what I just witnessed. "You were pleasuring yourself."

He’s quiet and still.

I hadn’t meant it as an accusation, but thankfully Justin doesn’t seem to take offense. "I’m just curious…"

"I have needs, Selena, as you know."

I nod. "We both do." I take a step closer.

"Be careful, sweetness. You’re playing with fire, tempting me, making me want something I can’t have."

"Who says you can’t?" I don’t know who the girl is taunting him, but I’m feeling bold and restless and lonely. It’s a piss poor combination, and makes me want to act out.

He lifts one dark eyebrow, watching me closely. "Did you change your mind about all this, because I’ll fuck you here and now, so deep you’ll still feel my cock inside you tomorrow."

I don’t say anything else, mostly because I don’t know what to say, but my body is humming with anticipation. My nipples harden against the flimsy tank top and my panties cling to my sensitive folds.

Justin releases a frustrated groan and pushes his palm against his erection – which is definitely still there. "What in the actual fuck, Selena?" His tone is a cross between playful and angry.

"I’m sorry I interrupted you," I say.

"Fuck it," he says, leaning his head back against the leather chair and closing his eyes.

When he opens them again, his anger is gone. All I see is lust.

"Why didn't you ever take me?" I ask.

"As the weeks passed, you started to mean more to me. I didn't want to take something from you that wasn't mine."

It is yours, I want to tell him. "But that day that Stella showed up, you were going to." I'd seen the look of resolve in his eyes and I knew he was finally going to give himself to me.

"Because I knew in that moment you belonged to me. Even without the auction, without the agreement. You were mine."

I watch his eyes, not disagreeing in the slightest. I still am.

The way his dark gaze sweeps over to mine tells me he wants me, yet he’s choosing not to push me. I want to know why. "Why did you suggest we be just friends?" I ask.

He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. Then he motions for me to sit down in one of the chairs across from his desk.

I follow his lead and sit, tucking my bare legs underneath me. The tank top and pajama short set I’m wearing is no match against the cool air conditioning. Either that or my body is still trembling from what I witnessed when I walked in.

"I was developing real feelings for you, something that scared the fuck out of me given my past."

"I don’t understand. We were both falling…" It’s the first time I’ve admitted my true feelings, but something tells me this is no surprise to him.

Justin doesn’t say anything, he just patiently watches me like we have all night to sit here and speak in riddles. Perhaps his just friends speech was only that – a hollow request made only to get me to stay.

"If you want a real shot with me, I need a few things from you," he says.

"Such as?"

"You know I’ve been burned before when it comes to women, and money and trust."

"Yes," I acknowledge.

"Women usually only want me for my money," he adds.

"What does that have to do with me?" I am the furthest thing from a gold digger there is.

"Well, you have to admit the start to our relationship doesn’t exactly instill confidence. You only agreed to go with me that night because I was paying you."